The Original Crowd (A Whole New Crowd 0.50)
“For you and him. It’s a new chapter. And you’ll have someone who’ll enter your chapter. But you have to let that last page end. Finish your chapter with Devon.”
Wow. This was even making sense to me. Brian and I had an entire set of books between the two of us. Maybe I needed to figure out where my new chapters were—with Pedlam friends, Geezer and Grayley, and with my new life. Shit—maybe Tray even needed to be included.
No. Not yet.
Honey was still murmuring to Mandy, “He was yours.”
Mandy turned to hug her instead. Honey wrapped her arms around her and propping her chin on Mandy’s shoulder, she whispered, “Four years. You guys were a part of each other. And now…he’s not a part
of you anymore. It’s okay to not be okay with that. She won’t replace you. No matter what. She can’t go back to those four years and take your place. Those four years were yours.”
God. That’s what I’d been doing. I was so focused on moving forward, cutting all my ties—I’d just now started mending those with Grayley and Geezer again. But…a part of my identity had been with Brian.
And I’d been floundering because I hadn’t even realized it. That a part of me was missing. Or that I needed to figure out who I was again.
I realized my hands were fisting the bedcovers. I was trying to restrain myself to stay there. But every instinct I had in me was screaming for me to get the hell out of there. Just—run and hide.
Yeah. I confronted. I confronted when it was a battle that had to be done. But this stuff—this feeling stuff—I always ran the opposite way.
So I was forcefully keeping myself there. Anyway I could.
Mandy needed me. She, at least, needed my presence there.
So I stayed.
And I felt my insides tearing as I listened to Mandy’s suffering.
*
I was still really uncomfortable, but I hung in there. Mandy had cried—sobbed really—for most of the night. Honey had stayed with her. I’d laid back on the bed, content to say a few words every now and then. But Honey had done most of the heavy-lifting. Bit had even been granted access. At one point she helped Honey out and—of course—Mandy had cried even harder.
I’d persevered.
I probably aged a good twenty years because of it. But I stayed.
“What time is it?” Mandy asked, hoarsely.
“It’s, like, four in the morning,” Bit replied, sighing happily.
“Four in the morning?” Mandy gasped, sitting up. “I can’t believe it’s that late.”
“Just tell Mom and Dad what you always tell ‘em.” I suggested tiredly. Mandy usually told ‘em she’d crash at a girlfriend’s. She didn’t want them to be worried about her driving late at night. It always worked.
“Well, I know…and I already did. But still—we spent almost the entire party in here.”
“Tray had three kegs. And I’m pretty sure they were carrying in a fourth one when I came up here,” I murmured, yawning.
It was the best timing because we heard a knock at the door. A second later, Amber stuck her head in. “Hey.” She grinned, cautiously, at Mandy. Her eyes skimmed over Honey, Bit, and myself, but they lingered on Mandy. “Can I come in?”
Mandy took a deep breath and nodded. Soothing her hair back, she said, “Thanks, guys. I’ll be…I’ll be okay.”
I studied Amber intently, trying to figure out if she had intent to harm or foul.
Mandy sighed. “Taryn, leave her alone.”
So I did and followed behind Honey and Bit outside the door.
They were sharing a look when I closed the door behind me.