Kissing My Dad's Friend

My father couldn’t have looked more gob smacked if he’d tried.

Beside me, Russ shoots me an unmistakable smile. A proud one. Like he admires me. And I realize, I admire that part of myself too. I’d finally found the strength I never knew I had or needed before.

“She’s right,” Russ says a moment later. He holds up a hand to stave me off. “And before you tell me not to risk my job for you, don’t bother, Maggie. I’m not sure I can stop myself from risking everything for you. Not anymore.” He holds my gaze for a long moment, long enough for me to read everything else he means in that deceptively simple statement.

My whole body tingles, from the tip of my head to my toes. I feel so elated I could fly. A smile starts to spread across my face, and I can’t stop it. I don’t want to, either. I feel the same way. I want to risk everything for this man. Whatever it takes.

Across the desk from us, my father stares. Back and forth between us, like he’s doing a calculation in his head. I lift my chin and stare right back, defiant. Let him think whatever he wants. He doesn’t scare me anymore.

For the first time in my entire life, my father looks away from me first. “I see how you both feel now,” he says, softly, dangerously. I’m not sure what that means.

I’m not sure I care anymore.

Without another word, he rises and reaches for his coat.

“John,” Russ starts to say beside me. “Be reasonable.”

“I am being reasonable,” my father replies, his voice shaking with barely suppressed fury. “I am reasonably going to leave this matter to decide in the morning. Tomorrow once everyone’s heads are clearer. That is as much leeway as you’ll gather from me, Russ, so I’d suggest you take it. You are both dismissed for now.”

I’m not sure whether that means fired or just released for tonight. I can’t bring myself to worry about it, not now. Not when every limb in my body feels shaky from spent energy and adrenaline. Not when my bed is not just calling my name, but screaming it.

I rise, expecting to go with Dad, the way I do every night. But he storms out of his office without waiting for me. When I jog after him, I notice he’s already taken the elevator. Guess I’m finding my own way home tonight.

Behind me, I hear soft footfall. Russ brings a hand to rest on my shoulder. “Give him time to cool off,” he says, sounding uncertain. “He’ll be reasonable.”

I snort. Russ doesn’t disagree with the sound. But at least we’re alone now. Safe, for one more night. With one last glance at the empty hallways around us, I lean back a little. My head rests against Russ’s chest. I can hear the beat of his heart in my ear where it leans against him. A moment later, his strong arms circle my waist, and he draws me back against him, swaying gently from side to side as he does.

“Whatever happens, I’m proud of you,” he says softly. “You stood up to your father. That takes real courage.”

I reach up to loop my hands around his forearms. I trace my fingers up and down the length of his arms, marveling all over again that I’m able to do this. Touch the man I daydreamed about for so long, so easily. “You were pretty great too. Giving him a piece of your mind.”

Russ chuckles softly, and the sound makes my whole body shiver, pressed close to him as I am. “To be honest, I should have said all that to your father a long, long time ago.”

“Yeah, well.” I let out a soft sigh. “That makes two of us.”

Russ’s hand slides up to tuck under my chin. He tilts my face toward his, and I kiss him softly over my shoulder. “Come on,” he whispers, his breath warm against my lips. “I think it’ll be best if you stay at my place tonight.”

I couldn’t agree more. With a shiver of relief, I let him take my hand and gently lead me down the hallway, out into the night. This time, when we get to his place after an hour of traffick in the beat-up old vintage car Russ drives—one that, I now realize, matches his whole apartment aesthetic too, old but in a stylish, purposeful way—we don’t even undress. Both of us are too tired to do anything but just collapse straight into bed, fully clothed. But when Russ gently reaches over to tuck me against his side, I let out a contented sigh.

After the day we’ve just had, this is somehow the perfect way to end it. Cuddled up together, resting before we have to face whatever tomorrow will bring. I couldn’t be with anyone more comforting right now, or who understands what I’m going through more completely.