Dawn (Cutler 1)
"I'll have to tell them where I'm going and—"
"You tell them everything? All the time?" He shook his head. "Parents expect you to do secret things sometimes. They do," he said. "How about it?"
"I don't know. I’ll see," I said. There was such frustration in his eyes. "Maybe one night."
"Good." He looked around and drew closer. "Philip, someone could see us," I said when he brought his lips closer.
"Just a quick congratulations kiss," he said and brought his lips to mine. He even brought his hand to my breast.
"Philip," I protested. He laughed.
"All right. So," he said, standing straight again, "are you nervous about singing at the concert?"
"Of course. It will be the first time I've ever sung by myself in front of so many people, and so any well-to-do people who have heard and seen really talented performers. Louise told me your sister's going to be jealous and angry about it. She expected to get the solo."
"She had it last year. Besides, she sounds like a foghorn."
"Oh, no, she doesn't," I said, looking up quickly. "But I wish she would stop saying nasty things about me. If I do well on a test, she tells people I cheated. She hasn't let up on me since I arrived. One of these days I'm going to have it out with her." Philip started to laugh. "It's not funny."
"I was laughing at how bright and intense your eyes become when you're angry. You can't hide your true feelings."
"I know. Daddy says I would be a terrible poker player."
"I'd like to play strip poker with you someday," he said, smiling licentiously.
"Philip!"
"What?"
"Don't say things like that," I said, but I couldn't help imagining it.
He shrugged.
"Can’t help it sometimes. Especially when I'm around you."
Could he hear my heart pounding? I saw some students coming around the corner behind us.
"I've got to get down to Daddy's office. He and Jimmy are probably waiting for me," I added and started down the stairway.
"Dawn. Wait."
I turned back to him. He joined me on the stairs.
"Do you think . . . I mean, since it's such a special occasion and all . . . that you can get your father and mother to let me take you to the concert at least?" he asked hopefully.
"I'll ask," I said.
"Great. I'm glad I waited around to see you," he added and leaned forward to kiss me. I thought he was going to kiss me quickly on the cheek, but he kissed me on the neck instead. He did it and was on his way before I had a chance to respond. The students coming down the corridor saw him and the boys howled. My heart didn't seem to fit my chest. It beat too fast, too fierce, too loud, and my pulse raced too excitedly. I was afraid Daddy and Jimmy would see the redness in my cheeks and know I had been kissed.
Surely there was something very special between me and Philip, I thought, if his merely kissing me or looking at me or speaking softly to me could set my body on fire, make me tingle and make me dizzy. I took a deep breath and sighed. Daddy and Momma just had to let him take me to the concert; they just had to, I thought. I had done what they had wanted and not nagged them to go out on dates, even though girls my age all around me were allowed to do so. It wasn't fair; they had to understand.
I could understand them bein
g a little afraid for me when I had first started at Emerson Peabody. But I believed I had grown considerably during these last few months anyway. Success with my music and my schoolwork had given me a new sense of confidence. I felt older, stronger. Surely if I saw that in myself, Momma and Daddy could see it as well.
Confident they would give me permission, I hurried down to the basement to meet Daddy and Jimmy and give them the news about my solo. I had never seen Daddy so excited and proud.
"You hear that, Jimmy boy!" he exclaimed, slapping his hands together. "Your sister's a star."