Dirty Secrets (Get Dirty 4)
I move a pawn forward, sacrificing it but not mentioning that I should remove my pants, letting the bets go for now in favor of the raw nakedness of our souls.
“An anarchist, are you?” I ask with a smirk. She shakes her head and I continue. “I will not let my city fall into the hands of someone who would ruin it with their narcissistic need for power. It is mine by birthright, but it remains mine because I am willing to do whatever is necessary for it, not for me.”
She runs a red fingertip along her King piece, my words turning in her head. “I think I can understand that. You couch it in pretty words like you always do, but every kingdom has war, insurgents, and instabilities. I need to know, though, Dominick. If I’m going to do this with you, I will not be set aside like some pretty woman without a brain in her head, kept in the dark as you do shady or dangerous things. Look at this board. A player who hides their Queen away is going to lose every game.”
“True, but real life isn’t chess.”
Allie smirks, trying a different route. “You’ll have to tell me everything, all of it, even the parts you know I won’t like. One, because I won’t stand for it any other way, and two, because I think you need that. Somewhere you can filter all the ugliness, a soft place to land, someone who doesn’t give a shit about the city but cares for you. Let me be that for you?”
I look at her in surprise, sitting up to my knees to lean over the board and kiss her. She leans into me, our kiss warm, smoldering, but not naughty . . . yet.
I whisper against her lips, letting her taste the truth. “You already are.”
She smacks her lips against mine and pulls back slightly. I watch as the smile grows from a small hint to a wide, full exuberance. She’s happy, and I marvel that I can be the cause of that for her, something I rarely give to anyone, but she seems to take it from me easily.
I can see she’s aroused too, but when my eyes flicker down to her stiffening nipples, she holds up a hand. “Whoa, cowboy. We’re not done with Serious Talk. But remind me to return to that.”
She winks at me, but a moment later, the roller coaster of emotion drops in freefall and her face is washed in a sense of sadness as doubt takes her.
“I’m scared, Dominick. Seeing what happened last night, I don’t know if I can really be the right woman for all that out there.” She waves a hand at the window, indicating the city outside. “But I’m damn sure I can be the one for you, if you’ll let me.”
I can see her demons chasing her, whispering in her ear that she’s weak, not good enough, can’t handle this, but I am fierce enough to fight her demons. More importantly, though, she can fight them herself and has done so many times over, beating them into a box in her mind. I just need to be the backup sometimes, give her the right words to remind her. She’s the true Rocky Balboa. I’m just Mick, though thankfully, younger and better-looking.
“Allison, I know you are strong enough. Last night was the deep end, and you got tossed in without warning to a near worst-case scenario with it being your family, but I can be your water wings until you’re comfortable swimming. Because yes, I’d appreciate your opinion, your insight, and your tendency to make things a little chaotic. We balance each other, I think.” I take her hands in mine, vowing, “You are the only one I would want to be by my side, here or anywhere. You’re mine, Allison. Before you even knew it, you were mine. And before you’d even asked for it, you had my heart. And it is the same today as it will be tomorrow.”
Allie takes a deep breath, and I hope she’s letting the promise of my words fill her, leaving no room for doubts. Finally, she lets the air out slowly through her nose and looks me squarely in the eyes.
“So that means trackers, guards, and all that again? Cameras?”
Part of me feels like things have come full-circle, and we’re right back where we were weeks ago. Even as readily as she seems to have accepted the ugly parts of my role as The Boss and the cold machinations I’m known for, I’m hesitant to subject her to the constant watchfulness again.
But it simply can’t be any other way.
“Yes, though we can ensure full transparency. You’ll know everything. I need that from you or I’ll go mad with worry, Allie. But,” I say, holding up a hand before she can object, “I offer something in return.”