Five First Dates (Sassy in the City 2)

My throat constricted and I just shook my head. I had nothing left to say. I took three steps and made it to the door. I ran down the stairs, my boots pounding the concrete. I burst onto the street and looked up at the sky.

No stars.

It was all so fucking unfair.

Chapter 16

I almost fell face-first onto the floor scrambling to get off of the couch. “Maddox!”

The door slammed shut behind him.

Where the hell were my keys? And my shoes? I needed to go after him but I couldn’t go far because of Sully. Just downstairs. But if I caught him in front of the building, it would be okay.

By the time I found my keys and grabbed my phone, it was too late to worry about shoes, so I locked my apartment door behind me and ran down the stairs in socks. I shoved open the front door of my building and slid outside a la Bridget Jones, though wearing pants.

“Maddox!”

I didn’t see him in either direction.

“Shit!” He was just gone.

I had things to say to him. I needed to explain myself better. That I was trying to do the right thing, that I didn’t want to hurt him. Most of all, that I did love him. That I didn’t care about tattoos (hell, those were hot) but I didn’t trust myself. I hadn’t said any of it right.

I called him but he didn’t pick up. I jumped up and down in frustration, making tight fists. “Argh!”

Then I went back upstairs because I wasn’t going to leave Sully alone for longer than a minute or two. I called Maddox again. This time it went right to voicemail. He’d either turned off his phone or declined my call.

I thought about texting him but I wasn’t sure what to say.

He had said he would return the next day for his stuff. That would give me at least ten hours to figure out what to say.

I threw myself on my bed facedown and marveled at the irony that the night before I had been in this same position and Maddox had been lying next to me. Now I was alone and frankly, I deserved it.

I stayed up half the night, tossing and turning, tearing up, berating myself and life and all things Julia Roberts.

Around four, I finally fell asleep and dreamed that Ryan Reynolds was in my face, laughing hysterically.

My head was pounding like I’d downed four martinis, but I dragged myself into the shower and got both myself and Sully ready. The girls and I had brunch plans. Dakota liked to call us the bitches who brunch, but I liked to think of it more as #squadgoals. We tried to make time every couple of months to do brunch, and thank all the powers of the universe it was brunch Sunday because I needed serious advice.

Dakota stared at me over her chicken and waffles. “I’m so confused.”

We had spent the first twenty minutes of brunch going over Leah’s amazing engagement party, catching up on each other’s Instagram stories from the event, and complimenting Leah on how beautiful she had looked. Which was exactly the way it should be two days after your engagement party. But when the conversation had drifted to Dakota’s upcoming laser hair removal I figured I could explain what had gone down between me and Maddox.

“Well, that makes two of us,” I said, aggressively

wiping down the tray and area in front of Sully with an antibacterial wipe for the second time.

“Friday night he tells you he loves you. You say it back. Am I right? And now he’s moving out and you are basically breaking up?” She turned to Isla. “Does that make sense to you?”

“I’m picking through it.” Isla lifted up her coffee, and set it back down. “Nope. I’m in the dark.”

“What is there to explain?” I said, feeling exasperated. “He basically told me he came here with a crush still and that he planned to have sex with me. It wasn’t totally spontaneous. I told him that I can’t be trusted to make good decisions when it comes to men and now that I have a son I need to be…” I was searching for the right word.

“Celibate?” Felicia asked.

“Ew. That wasn’t exactly what I meant, but I guess so, yes.”

“When is sex ever actually spontaneous?” Leah asked. “I could sit here and argue that the first time Grant and I hooked up was spontaneous. Twisted ankle, a ride home, etc. But that only happened because we’d been lusting after each other for six months. You were lusting after Maddox since the second you saw him and apparently, he’s been lusting after you for a decade.” She sipped her mimosa, clearly a woman who knew things now that she was engaged.