Christmas Ever After (Puffin Island 3)
Her smile dimmed. “You’re really upset. I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry? You weren’t the one trying to manipulate my love life.”
“But I know how that feels. And I’m sorry because although I know you hate talking about your marriage under any circumstances, the real reason you’re upset is because your grandmother talked about it in front of me. Not only am I pretty much a stranger, but you don’t even like me. Revealing deep feelings to someone you don’t know is an uncomfortable experience. It makes you feel vulnerable. I know, because that’s how I felt yesterday.”
The only sound in the room was the crackle of the log fire.
“You didn’t seem vulnerable.”
“Are you kidding? First I bled on you, then I threw up in front of you. That, believe me, is a low point for anyone, so don’t talk to me about being emotionally vulnerable because where you are concerned I have been naked in every possible sense of the word. I have a clear recollection of thinking ‘kill me now’ at several points last night.” She gave a crooked smile that told him that no matter how bouncy she seemed, the past twenty-four hours had wounded more than her head.
“Out of all that, the worst part was throwing up?”
“No. The very worst part,” she said slowly, “was needing your help in the first place. If I’d made a list of all the guys in the world I would not have wanted to see me at my lowest point, you would have been right there at the top. In the summer you made it clear you thought I was hopeless, and I actually enjoyed our moments of unarmed combat where I proved you wrong and then suddenly, wham, I’m in a situation where I prove you right.” Her surprisingly honest admission unlocked something inside him.
“That’s not how I see you.”
“I know exactly how you see me, Alec. To you I’m this ditzy, useless, princess blonde who can’t get through a meal without having her hand held and the annoying thing is that I can’t even prove you wrong right now.” There was an edge to her tone and she rubbed her fingers over her forehead and gave a helpless shrug. “Ignore me. It’s not a contest.”
“That’s not how I see you,” he repeated. “I know I’m the last person you would have chosen to have by your side through this, and yet despite everything, despite the fact that your life has been shredded in front of someone you hate, you have been gutsy, good-humored and dignified.” Her throat moved and she stared hard into the fire. “I don’t hate you. And that’s probably the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”
“Probably the only nice thing I’ve ever said to you.” And he felt a flash of guilt because he knew that the reason for that had nothing to do with her. “I think you’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met, but you’re right that I’m not good at disclosing personal details in front of people. Anyone. It makes me feel—”
“Naked? Alec, I was naked in front of you. Literally. So I think I’m winning in the battle of personal humiliation.” He wished she hadn’t brought that up.
“I hate it when my fa
mily talk about me. It’s like walking into the supermarket and discovering I’ve forgotten to put on my trousers.”
“That happens often?”
“Never. But it was a recurring nightmare of mine when I was eight. It stayed with me.”
Her smile was back, warm and generous. “Mine was discovering I was wearing odd shoes.”
“It worked out well for Cinderella.”
“That was one shoe, not odd shoes. I don’t think Prince Charming would have looked twice at her if she’d been wearing one red Prada and one silver Jimmy Choo.” She started clearing up the glasses. “Why do you hate talking about your marriage?”
“I’m not good at admitting failure.”
“Is it failure or is it life?”
“It definitely feels like failure. I tried to make it work, but I couldn’t give Selina what she wanted.” Why the hell was he telling her this? “I hurt her. Badly.”
Sky gave him a long look. “And she hurt you.”
“Most of it wasn’t her fault.”
“You really believe that? Is that why you don’t date? Because you think you’re this bad guy who is going to hurt women? That’s bullshit, Alec.”
“You don’t know me.”
“I’ve learned a thing or two since yesterday. I never would have guessed this in the summer, but it turns out that buried underneath that badass, moody exterior is a real chivalrous streak. I know that because nothing less than a chivalrous streak would have driven you to take me back to your hotel room and then bring me here. And I suspect that is what prevents you from placing the blame for your divorce where it should surely lie. On the shoulders of your ex-wife.” She walked to the door and paused while he opened it. “I think your grandmother is right. You should start dating again, Alec.”
He clenched his jaw, thinking that he felt more naked now than he had when he’d stepped out of the shower. If the weekend carried on like this, they’d have no secrets left by the end of it. “That isn’t going to happen.”
“It should. It’s true that you border on the arrogant and your communication tends to veer toward sarcasm, but you have great biceps, and there are plenty of women who find brooding and cynical to be attractive traits. If you kept your mouth shut, I’m sure you could attract one of them.” Flashing a smile, she walked past him, leaving him drugged by a light cloud of perfume and a lethal dose of lust.