Voyeur

“Callum.” He corrected, stepping closer. My breath got trapped in my lungs as I watched him approach, only a few inches between us. I waited on edge for him to lift his hand and touch me, but it never came. “You can always call me Callum.”

“Okay,” I said on my exhale. My head swam at his nearness.

“It was time. To go home.”

I nodded dumbly, not sure what to say, but wanting to know everything.

“I was a mess, and what I was before was just a mess hidden by a fine veneer. I thought I had gained control over myself—over my past, and it was a lie. Every little thing that brought it up sent me into a tailspin. Which I could ignore because it had been just me.” He breathed out a laugh and smiled at me. “Then there was you, and my loss of control became an issue. I could no longer ignore it and bury my head in the sand. I was faced with how my actions would affect my future. And Oaklyn, I want a future. A future I can choose. A future not haunted by my past.”

I didn’t realize I was crying until his thumb came up to wipe at my tears. I leaned into his palm, letting the warmth of his touch comfort me in a way I hadn’t had in almost a month. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cry. I’m just happy for you. You seem happier.”

“I am and I’m not. I saw a therapist at home and he recommended one here, so I’m hoping to get to a better place and stay there. But there are other things that hold me back.” His hand still lingered on my cheek, and I fought to not turn my head and press my kiss to his palm. To step into him and press myself against his warmth.

“I quit Voyeur.” I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I’d wanted to tell him as soon as I’d done it. I had walked into class floating on hope that we were going to recover. And he hadn’t been there. So, I blurted it out now.

“What?” he asked, just as shocked as me that I’d tossed it out there. “When?”

“About two weeks ago.”

“But—but what about school? What about Jackson?”

I shook my head trying to understand, and his hand dropped. “What about Jackson?”

“Aren’t you two together? I mean, I saw you getting out of his car before I left. He had his arms around you and kissed you.”

His words sounded like barely restrained anger, and I racked my brain before flashing back to the day he probably saw us. I remembered Jackson’s hug as he said goodbye. I could only imagine what he thought.

“No, we’re not together. He was giving me a ride to school after I quit. I’d sold my car the day before and he offered to drive me.”

“You sold your car? Why?”

“It was enough money to get me through the end of the year, and I could quit Voyeur. It became . . . painful to be there.” When I paused to look at him, he grimaced. “Don’t wince like you have any responsibility for my feelings working there. It’s not like I loved it. Voyeur was a means to an end, and I didn’t want it anymore, so I found a better solution.”

I slicked my tongue across my dry lips. “I’m sorry Callum. I’m sorry I was so stubborn and refused to see other options. I should have let you pay. I shouldn’t have let you walk away because of my pride and misguided assumptions with money. I’ve seen money ruin too many relationships, and I couldn’t have it happen to us.” I laughed softly at that. “But I guess it did anyway. And honest to god, if my car wouldn’t have been enough money to quit, I would have come to you. I was done being away from you. I miss you.”

“Oaklyn,” he whispered my name in relief. Relief that it was over.

We’d both made strides to get back to each other.

“Also, I got an internship with the college’s physical therapy team. It starts in the summer.”

“That’s amazing.”

My chest swelled at his pride in me.

“Between that and scholarships, grants, and loans, I should be okay. I may have to use candles and eat Ramen until everything comes through, but I’ll be okay.”

He laughed with me and stepped in close, pulling the breath from my lungs. Fuck he was so close. My breasts heaved, brushing against his chest. My skin lighting on fire, yearning to touch him.

“Callum,” I whispered his name on a broken breath. I wanted to pull him close and never let go.

“I’ll feed you,” he said before leaning down to peck my nose. “Not because you need me to, but because I miss eating lunch with you and I love watching you enjoy food the way you do. Also, because you make me amazing brownies.”