Looking Inside
“It’s no good,” Kevin said bitterly, tossing his glass down on a table.
“What’s no good? She’s no good?”
“She’s fantastic,” Kevin corrected, blue eyes blazing.
Trey threw up his hands in a surrender gesture. “Okay, okay. So . . . spell it for the feebleminded. Why are you so upset?”
“You don’t know what it’s like,” Kevin said, sitting forward restlessly in his chair. Trey saw a wildness in his eyes he’d never seen before. “I can’t stop thinking about her. I’ve traveled all over the world for most of my adult life, and never thought twice about the distance. Now all of a sudden, I hate every single fucking mile, because it’s taking me farther away from her. And the thing of it is, she’s all wrong for me.”
“In what way?”
“She’s too young, for one thing. Twenty-seven.”
“A mature twenty-seven?”
Kevin scoffed. “Elizabeth was born more mature than me.”
Trey smiled. It was weird seeing his brother like this, so discombobulated over a woman. “Good. You need someone to keep you under control . . . balance you out.”
Kevin gave him a dirty look. “Like you should talk, Mr. Viral Sex Video.”
“Elizabeth,” Trey mused, pointedly ignoring Kevin’s barb about that infuriating video with the stupid Scarpetti sisters. No, he’d been the stupid one on that occasion. What the hell had he been thinking? He hadn’t been, that was the whole problem. He still cringed inwardly in regret and embarrassment every time he thought of his mother hearing about it. Plus, his dad had bought her a computer recently. He’d told his mom point-blank about the rumors regarding the video a couple years back, wanting to prevent her hearing about it from one of her girlfriends or a cousin or something. But what if she’d actually watched it?
“I like that name,” Trey decided. “It’s got substance. Like Elizabeth Bennet from Pride and Prejudice.”
Eleanor was a name of substance too.
Kevin gave him a look like he was losing his mind, scattering Trey’s weird, out-of-nowhere thought. “That’s Elizabeth, all right,” Kevin said, obviously too distracted to notice Trey’s momentary oddness for long. “She’s got so much substance, sometimes I feel like I’ll learn something new about her every day.”
“So she’ll keep you on your toes for the rest of your worthless life, then. What are you so worried about?”
Kevin hesitated. It was beyond strange, seeing his cocky brother so unsure.
“But . . . what if one day, I learn something about her I don’t like?”
“Like, if you discover she’s not perfect?” Trey asked, frowning.
Kevin gave him a startled glance. “No, it’s not that. I don’t think she’s perfect.”
“Sounds to me like you do.”
“Like you don’t demand perfection of the women you date,” Kevin muttered, rolling his eyes.
“I don’t,” Trey defended. “I demand honesty.”
“Yeah, honesty about all their faults. How many people do you know who want to spill all their ugly secrets on the first date?”
“Did you come here to talk about my love life, or yours?” Trey countered.
Kevin seemed to deflate. He struck Trey as seeming hopeless in that moment, more vulnerable than he’d ever seen him. It worried Trey. Is that what love did to you?
“Do you actually love her?” Trey asked, thinking it’d be best to start at the basics.
Kevin looked him straight in the eye. “Like crazy.”
“Well there you go. Look, you know I’m no expert at this. Recently, I’ve kind of been struggling with what it all means too.”
“Of course I know you’re no expert. Maybe that’s why you’re the only person I felt comfortable talking to about it,” Kevin said glumly. “Everyone else would have just patronized me.”