Everybody Knows (Razes Hell 2)
Jason raised his hand and softly stroked my cheek. “I need you to be really sure about that. I don’t mean this as any chivalrous, cheesy bullshit. You know who I am, Lucy. I’ve got ten years on you. I’m about as far from innocent as it’s possible to be.”
While the idea of him being with other women made me tingle with jealousy, hearing him describe himself that way made me want him more. Made my body shiver with the idea of how good he could make me feel. That shiver – I knew – was entirely at odds with how I felt about casual sex. After all, casual sex was pretty much the only kind of sex Jason had ever had. However, he’d also made it clear that he didn’t hook up with every woman who looked in his direction, and I knew that to be true. He wasn’t that bad. In the category of sleeping around, Joey was a lot worse. I didn’t expect everyone to have the same views as me, and I wasn’t about to judge him for doing what many men would have done in his position.
“I’m sure. Absolutely, completely sure.”
“Okay. But we’re not going to rush this.”
“That’s not going to change public perception though, is it? People will think we are, and they’re still going to be saying things about you that aren’t true.”
He nodded. “I know. And as much as I want to see where things go with you, the one thing I can’t handle is people accusing me of being a pervert just for being with you.”
“I understand. I don’t want that either. As much as I want this, I won’t be the reason your life falls apart.”
Jason closed his eyes and rested his forehead against mine. “How did you get to be so sensible?”
“Well, for one thing, I’m Ellie’s sister.”
Jason laughed. “That would do it. You two aren’t alike in most ways, but you’re both pretty smart when it comes to making the right decisions.”
“Doesn’t mean we like those decisions, Jase.”
“I know. And it’s often me who ends up being the cause of those tough decisions. I’d like to step up and make this decision to save you from doing it, but this isn’t only about me. Mostly, I want to do what’s best for you.”
“Well, that’s interesting. Because I want to do what’s best for you.”
He brushed his lips against mine, his fingers tracing small circles on my lower back. “I don’t want you to go, Luce. I don’t. But I can’t see how we’re going to get any real time to work out where we are while we’re on the road.”
I nodded. He’d reached the same conclusion as me, and it sucked. I loved that we thought the same way, but the reality of what it meant made my heart break a little.
“I don’t want to go. I don’t want to go home and have to deal with Ellie and Mum and Dad trying to talk me out of being with you. But I know if I stay it could kill us. And everything you’ve worked for.”
I also knew that me going home wouldn’t be the end of the drama. Not forever. It would calm things down while the tour continued, but once Jason and I were seen together again, the stories would flare up again too. And it could still spell disaster for Jason and the band. But maybe that was something to worry about when we got there. Maybe what mattered was cooling the situation down now and hoping the world found something else to freak out about in the meantime.
“What are you thinking, Luce?”
I sighed, my eyes meeting his. “I’m scared the problems will never go away. Or at least not long enough for us to prove that there’s nothing wrong about us. We’ve known each other forever. We have a solid foundation that most couples never have. I feel like we have a really good friendship that turned into something else, but if people keep putting pressure on us, maybe they’ll break it and… then we might not even be friends anymore.”
“That’s not going to happen. I know I’m not well known for being sensible but we’re going to take this so slowly that if either of us feels like it won’t work, we can step away from it without ruining everything.” Jason stroked my cheek. “You said you weren’t asking for forever, and you know I can’t promise that. But I can promise that for as long as this makes sense, I’ll do everything I can to make sure you don’t get hurt.”
Why couldn’t Ellie see this Jason? I knew she used to. She used to think he was the best person in the whole world. And in spite of what she’d said about him hurting me, and his selfishness, she had to know she wasn’t being fair. He’d messed up more times than I knew about, I was sure of that. But he had always done everything he could to fix the things he’d broken. Why couldn’t anyone accept that he’d grown up, or acknowledge the hard work he’d done to get his life back on track?
“I don’t need as much protecting as you think,” I whispered. “But thank you.”
“I know that. You’re tougher than people are giving you credit for. I’m just saying, I’m going to work damn hard so you don’t have to be tough.”
Butterflies flapped around in my stomach at his words. Who was this guy? How did someone who portrayed himself as so dangerous turn into the sweet man before me?
He grinned as if, once again, he’d read my mind. “Don’t be fooled.” He winked, and a mischievous sparkle flickered in his eyes. “I’m still the Jason you see on stage too. But what kind of man would I be if I didn’t take care of my woman?”
My mouth dried out. I was his woman. His. Woman.
 
; I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his, kissing him harder than I ever had before. It had always been so gentle, but at that moment, I wanted him to be in no doubt how I felt. How much I wanted him. How much I wanted to make this work.
Jason pulled me in tighter, his tongue flicking into my mouth and making me push my body against his, my fingers twisting into his hair. His hands slipped lower and he bunched up the bottom of my shirt, pushing it up slightly so his fingers touched my skin.
It wasn’t enough. That light touch wasn’t enough, I needed more, and as heat flooded through me, a tiny moan of desperation slipped from my lips. Jason’s fingers moved higher, resting on the strap of my bra.