Chasing Him (Dark Love 4)

My words twist around my tongue, trying to come out without a heated exchange. “I’m going to talk,” I tell him, clearing my throat and keeping my distance. “I’m going to say what I need to say, then walk out of this room if you don’t want to talk.”

He continues to sit still, not even a flinch.

“I had no idea this was going on. But I understand now why she didn’t tell me. I wouldn’t have been able to hide their relationship from you. Adriana may be like family, but you are my husband. I made vows to you, and I’ve always been honest with you throughout our marriage.”

Lex’s eyes wander across to me, yet unable to meet my gaze. Instead, they linger where I stand, vacant, and wordless.

“I’m hurt at the names you called me, insinuating I could be romantically or sexually linked to Julian in any form. I respect your position here and understand your hurt and anger. But this is Adriana’s life and not mine,” I say, my arms folded across my chest as if I’m trying to shield myself from what he’s about to unleash. “This is not my choice, and yes, if I had some control over the universe, he probably wouldn’t have been the person I would choose for her. But she cares deeply for him, and given what she’s gone through, I will respect her decision and do not want to be caught in the crossfire because I shouldn’t even be a part of their equation.”

His gaze shifts back toward the glass, probably wishing he had more alcohol.

Exhausted from last night, I let out a sigh knowing all this is fruitless. “I’m tired, Lex. All I ask from you is to please sober up before the girls come home tonight.”

With a heavy heart, I turn my back as he calls my name. Spinning back, my eyes lay upon him, and finally, he meets my gaze.

“I’m sorry.”

I nod, unsure of what to say besides what’s in my heart. “I know. Still hurts, just so you know.” So, I close the door behind me and leave him be, knowing he needs to be alone, and nothing I say or do will change that. My feet drag up the stairs, barely able to make it to the top. I must have only had three hours of sleep at best. Removing the clothes I borrowed from Adriana, I throw a tank and pair of bed shorts on then climb into bed.

The pillow sinks beneath my face, the comfortable doona and sheets wrapping my body with warmth. My eyes close and I begin to doze off. They’re heavy and tired, unable to stay open a moment longer.

I let out a moan, the bed shuffling beside me. The weight of my eyes too heavy, I can’t open them until gentle arms wrap around my body, and the fresh smell of body wash invades my senses. Lips are buried in my neck, but they are slow and sensual, not the usual frenzied panic I’ve grown accustomed to every time Lex gets his hands on me.

“Charlotte,” he whispers in my ear. “Please turn around.”

My heart is fluttering, ready to meet my destiny of the enchanting emerald eyes. I turn around, shuffling until I’m on my side. I see the anguish in his expression, and despite it all, I know he needs me more than anything to reassure him, it will be okay.

My fingers reach out, caressing his cheek. “It’s always been you… and will always be you. Please stop torturing yourself.”

“I can’t lose you.”

“It’s not possible,” I murmur, tracing his lips as he lets out a soft moan. “But you must control yourself, Lex. For the sake of the girls and me

, especially if he’s going to stick around.”

Lex doesn’t say a word, perhaps the reality is finally sinking in. With a sigh, he buries his head into my chest, and I hold onto him. His vulnerability is laid out, no holding back, as I stroke his hair to calm his racing heart, which beats against my stomach as we lay side-by-side.

I don’t know how long we’re like this for, but we both manage to fall asleep in each other’s arms. It’s exactly what we both need.

At least, that’s what I thought until I’m woken with my tank top pulled down and his mouth on my breasts.

I let out a long-winded moan, arching my back, quickly glimpsing at the time to make sure the girls aren’t coming home anytime soon. We have two hours, exactly.

Lex catches me looking at the time. “You’re so predictable. How long do we have?”

“Two hours.”

With his eyes piercing mine and his tongue running against his bottom lip, I watch as a devious smirk finally graces his lips, and I know I’m in trouble.

“You know what’s about to happen?” he asks, demanding my attention with his tone.

I nod, unable to hide my smile.

“We are going to fuck,” he tells me. “And we are going to fuck hard for two whole hours. And I’m going bareback because I need to feel you completely. You understand?”

I open my mouth to say something, but he covers it with his hand, trapping my words.

“Don’t even think about what that witch said about you getting pregnant. I’m not wearing a condom. Full stop! But if it eases your stress levels, I’ll pull out, and you can suck me off. Deal?”