Into the Darkness

Calm the fuck down, Charlie.

Taking a deep breath, I waited on edge for his words, knowing that whatever came out of that beautiful mouth would turn my world upside down.

“You look breathtaking, Charlotte,” he whispered in my ear before walking away.

I don’t know how I made it back to our table without my legs giving way or gushing all over the floor. Fuck! I was annoyed that in just a few words I would have taken him right there with everyone watching. I needed to pull myself together and remember whose ring was weighing down my left hand.

“Are you okay, gorgeous?” Jul

ian asked.

“I will be soon. Champagne and no food is a lethal combination.” As soon as I said that, waiters scurried around us and served us all the first course.

We chatted as we ate our meals. Everyone was impatiently waiting for the guest singer to appear later on in the night. I looked at my plate, a sudden loss of appetite as I closed my eyes, his words echoing in my mind… You look breathtaking, Charlotte. I couldn’t believe he was here, not to mention Adriana. I would bet all the money in my checking account that she was still angry with me. What would I say to her? I suddenly felt self-conscious, like I was being watched. I didn’t know where he was sitting in the room, but from wherever he was I could feel the heat of his stare. My head was spinning as I tried to come to terms with it all.

“So that’s him?” Bull’s whispered in my ear. She was sitting on my right, Julian on my left. Thank God Eric was telling some ridiculous and probably inappropriate story which had Julian’s full attention.

“Yes it is,” I replied, my voice barely a whisper.

“In a million years. What a coincidence. OK, for the record he acted like an arrogant prick but damn Charlie, hello Momma! He must be huge. Is he?”

“Oh geez, Eric is so rubbing off on you.” We both giggled.

After the next course was served, the crowds started forming again. The dance floor was filling up, the band playing The Way You Look Tonight. Classic Frank, classic New York.

“Babe, let’s show these rich folk how it’s done.” Rocky took Bull’s hand and she followed him onto the dance floor. Eric and Emma had left the table; I could see them across the room hovering around Sarah Jessica Parker – how predictable, I thought. If I knew Eric, he would bombard her about Sex and the City questions like who was the biggest bitch on set or why did she agree to wear those knee-high socks with heels.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Julian asked.

I leaned over and looked him in the eyes. It wasn’t fair to him, this whole Lex thing, except there was nothing going on but in my crazy imagination. “I was just thinking how nice it would be to have you all to myself on the dance floor.” I smiled.

“Well gorgeous, you would be happy to know I was just thinking the same thing.” He stood up and like the true gentlemen he was, he held out his hand and I grabbed onto it. “Gorgeous, do you know how happy you make me?”

“Mmm, the same as how happy you make me?” I said, smiling.

His face lit up, like he’d been waiting all night to hear these words. “I like hearing you call me your fiancé.”

“I could have introduced you as my partner, but that sounds like we’re lesbian lovers or something.”

“I wouldn’t object to eating you out all the time,” he joked.

“Neither would I.”

I loved our flirting. It was one of the best things about our relationship. I would feel butterflies all the time over such simple conversation. Except tonight my happy butterflies were battling, or more like knocking the living shit out of the nauseous ones. I wasn’t doing anything wrong so why did I feel like this?

We laughed as we danced, his body against mine. I closed my eyes and enjoyed this moment of bliss. Make this work, Charlie, I kept chanting in my head. I deserved someone who would love me and only me.

“Mind if I cut in? For old time’s sake?” I felt the blood drain from my body as he spoke the words. It was one thing to talk to him but another to be in close physical contact.

Julian looked pissed but being the gentleman he was, he quickly kissed my cheek and told me he would be over by the bar. Lex grabbed my hand, placing his other on my waist. Having him touch me was causing a massive meltdown inside. He smelled just like I remembered. I was careful not to close my eyes so I wouldn’t go back to that place I had once called home. The touch of his hand felt right, like he was still a part of me, but this was wrong, so very wrong. I danced quietly, enjoying the band as they sang a Dean Martin song.

“Charlotte, you really do look beautiful. Your favorite color, I see.”

I still remembered when I told him emerald was my favorite color. It was on the dance floor on prom night, and it all felt like déjà vu, only this time without the happy ending in the classroom.

“What do you want, Lex?” I was straight to the point but I needed to know what game he was playing. I couldn’t read him, not like before when I knew every part of him.

“I see you at the restaurant and you run from me. I run into you again and you avoid me. Can’t two long lost friends catch up after seven years?”