Into This River I Drown

He lets me go and steps back. “I have enjoyed our conversation, Benjamin

Green. I think maybe you have taught me some things. I hope you will continue to

surprise me.” He turns and starts walking toward the forest behind Little House. “Wait,” I call out before I can stop myself.

He stops but doesn’t turn.

“What did you tell Calliel? Just now?”

He looks up at the stars again and I follow his gaze. They look so brilliantly blue

against the night sky I think them like ice. “I told him that even though I would

return for him, I could understand why he did what he did. I told him he was very

lucky to have found one such as you, even if it can only be for a moment. I’ll see you

soon, Benji.” Even as he speaks the last words, white lights begin to flash around

him. They become almost too brilliant to look at. I cover my eyes with my hands,

squinting through my fingertips. I can make out the vague outline of massive wings, much larger than Calliel’s. They stretch out wide, glowing in the dark until they snap around Michael, cocooning him. The light explodes outward, and by the time the burned afterimage fades from my eyes, Michael is gone and I can hear footsteps

racing down the driveway.

Cal crashes into me, grips me tight, and runs his hands over me to make sure all

my parts are still attached. Once he is satisfied I am in one piece, he cups my face in

his big hands and kisses me, pressing my lips against my teeth. “Are you all right?”

he asks hoarsely, brushing his lips over mine again and again. “Are you all right?” I stare at him, seeing my reflection in the black of his eyes.

And yet he loves you….

“I’m okay,” I whisper, though that is so far from the truth it’s extraordinary. “What did he want?” he asks me. “What did Michael ask of you?” I kiss him again, needing to feel his strength. I hope he has enough to give for

what is to come.

“Benji! What did he want!”

I shudder in his hands. “To let us know we don’t have much time,” I whisper. “I

think the end is about to begin.”

part iv: the river

The man past the end of his life stood at the edge of the river. The River Crosser was long gone, having warned him he would not come back. The man had said he understood this, and that he couldn’t leave. Not yet. “You may always be lost, then,” the River Crosser had cautioned before he departed. Alone, the man stared long at his reflection, which had again appeared in the water. He saw many things flash by about his own life, both the good and the bad. He saw that he had not taken his life for granted, and that he had been kind. But above all else, what he saw the most was love.

And it gave him strength.

So he stood, his shoulders squared, his head held tall. He breathed in the air around him as twilight began to fall. And at the sounds from above of great wings taking flight, he cried out for the river to hear, his voice booming through the darkening night: “If it takes all I have and if it means I will never be found, then so be it! For my family, for my son, into this river I drown!”

michael’s sign

All over town, the flyers read:

THE ROSELAND CHAMBER OF COMMERCE PROUDLY PRESENTS