Dear Love, I Hate You (Easton High)

She has to restart the countdown five times before I agree to drag myself out of the car. Dia tangles her arm with mine as we walk to the door, and I muster a grateful smile.

We’re bursting into Theo’s kitchen uninvited ten seconds later. The party is at its height, the house crawling with drunk, judgmental kids. All eyes are on me from the moment we amble past the threshold.

I’m almost thankful for the deafening music.

The loud bass.

The hammering beat.

This way, I don’t hear the whispers, the laughs, the nasty names and insults following me everywhere I go. “Whore,” “Bitch,” “Boyfriend thief,” just to name a few. I pretend like I don’t notice the glares pointed at me, cruising through the crowd with Dia on my arm. We’ve barely stepped foot into the living room when a masculine voice yells my best friend’s name.

I flip my head to the left, and sure enough, Finn is tearing through the crowd to reach his girl. His yelling earns us the attention of most people in the living room.

Thanks, Finn.

“Missed me already?” He flashes a dimpled smirk, and Dia releases my arm. Finn’s lips descend over hers in a split second, and Dia stumbles back, gripping his collar for balance. “I thought you said you weren’t coming,” Finn rasps against her mouth.

“I-I’m not staying.” She clears her throat, backing away. “Vee needs to speak with Xavier. If you could just…”

Finn nods in understanding, and his eyes flick to me. He offers me an apologetic smile that reeks of pity and spins on his axis.

“The fuck you all looking at?” he barks at the nosey party people, and they quickly disperse into the crowd. Must be nice having the whole world either love or fear you.

“Where’s Xavier?” Dia asks in my place. I seriously don’t know what I’d do without her.

“Over there.” Finn gestures with his chin.

I spot him instantly.

He’s sitting on Theo’s leather couch with Brie, Lacey, Axel, and Theo. He’s got his arm tied around Brie’s neck, his hair still damp from the pool, but he’s all dressed now. Lacey and Brie are giggling, whispering into each other’s ears as they stare at us.

At me.

Meanwhile, Theo pities me, and Xavier stares blankly at me.

Like I’m see-through.

An old, broken toy he swapped out for a newer model.

“Come on.” Dia tugs on my forearm, but I stiffen up.

“D, let’s just go. This was a mistake.” I choke out.

“The only mistake here is his lying-ass. Time for the truth.” Dia drags me toward the couch, while Finn trails after his girl friend, notice the space. I wish the ground would swallow me whole when Dia comes to a stop before the couch. I can barely look at Xavier, let alone talk to him. Theo shocks me by speaking up.

“Looking good, Vee.”

I search for a hint of sarcasm in his voice, but weirdly enough, he seems genuine.

“Uh… thanks.” I fidget with the hem of my dress.

I usually don’t do dresses—like ever. But Dia convinced me that looking great would make me feel great, and I was dumb enough to let her pick my outfit. This dress shows way more cleavage and legs than I’m comfortable with.

“He’s right. Nice dress,” Finn chimes in.

I’m well aware they’re pity compliments, but I’ll take the confidence boost.

“Thanks.” I crack a shy smile.