Wash

“Goodnight,” he echoed, then went to make himself comfortable on the couch.

I stayed outside for another hour, just enjoying all the moonlight and stars and doing a lot of pondering. I wasn’t sure what I felt about Jake anymore. Part of me would always love him, but there was a part of me that still hated him for what he’d done to me. Part of me wanted to throw myself into his arms and feel his sweet kisses again, but the other part, which seemed to be speaking the loudest in my head, wanted to slap him across the face.

Chapter 7

I woke up early, showered, and got ready for the day. I slipped into a pair of blue jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. I finished my ensemble off with some stylish hiking boots Nadia had bought me prior to one of our fall hikes. Since I’d worn them a few times to break them in, I knew they’d be comfortable. I put on minimal makeup and pulled my hair back into a long ponytail. I was sure it’d be chilly, since it was only April, so I grabbed my favorite denim jacket with a vintage wash and bronze buttons. I also made sure to slip my sunglasses into my front pocket.

Suddenly, something caught my eye on the table: a bouquet of a dozen white roses. My curiosity piqued, I slipped the card out of the small envelope and read it under my breath: “A life with love will have some thorns, but a life without love will have no roses. I love you so much. Please forgive me.” I bit my lip and thought about those words. Jake couldn’t move on with his life knowing how hurt I was. Maybe he needed to hear me say I’d forgiven him, but I couldn’t lie to him like that.

Jake was on the patio when I walked out to see the sunrise on the rim, one of the most glorious natural displays I’d ever seen. Horizontal layers of pink and orange streaked across the gorgeous morning sky as the sun peeked through. He was dressed casually in dark-washed jeans, a long-sleeved button-down shirt, and brown hiking boots with thick soles for traction. His shirt showed off the solid wall of muscle underneath. He looked like he was ready to go on a desert mission, and I somewhat missed his tropical, wind-blown look. Jake stared at the beautiful sight. “A show like this gives the start of a day a whole new meaning,” he said, holding a cup of coffee.

“Without a doubt.”

He gazed up at me and smiled. “You look stunning, as usual. I gotta admit, I’m kinda jealous of those jeans, squeezing you in all the right places.”

“Um, thanks,” I said, a bit taken aback by his bluntness, “and thank you for the flowers.”

“It was nothing really. I have a lot of making up to do.”

I stared at him, confused. “It’s too late to fix things. You can’t put a Band-Aid on open-heart surgery.”

He set his coffee down on the patio table. “I’m not one to give up on things, Ashly. You, of all people, should know that.”

“Really? Because you gave up on us.”

He cleared his throat, shook his head, and took another sip of coffee.

I couldn’t meet his gaze and stared at the patio table. “I guess you were never one to quit before, now that I think about it,” I said, throwing the poor guy a bone. “The roses and that card were, uh…thoughtful. But let’s not turn this experience into something it isn’t. Let’s just get through this as painlessly as possible for both of us.”

He motioned me forward. “C’mere and look!” he said, pointing.

I glanced down from the balcony and watched deer grazing on dew-laden grass, a sweet scene like one in a painting or on a greeting card. “How cute,” I said.

Jake came from behind and wrapped his hands around my waist, pulling me close. “Do you see the babies?” he said, his hot breath hitting the skin on my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

I tried to pretend like his touch didn’t faze me, but it was hard to tune out the gorgeous hunk wrapped around me. “Yeah, I see them,” I said, turning around to face him. Once I was free of his grasp, I slowly stepped back.

“I love this place. All this nature and quiet makes you slow down and think about the important things in life,” he said, staring into my eyes.

This time, it was my turn to clear my throat and shake my head. “So, anyway…are you, uh, all packed for our overnighter at Phantom Ranch?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

He smiled as if he was sure I was smitten with him all over again, but I most definitely wasn’t. I had gotten over him a long time ago, and I refused to let his charm and handsome swallow me up again. I knew Jake would have no trouble with the ladies wherever he went. Even the receptionist at the lodge had shamelessly checked him out and flirted with him with me standing right next to him, checking in to the same suite. He hadn’t flirted back, but I was sure that was just because he was trying to impress me. For the time being, I only had to tolerate him, and it would be quite easy to ignore one jackass while I was bouncing atop another on my way down into the Grand Canyon.

Jake reached under his bed and grabbed a plastic bag. “I bought something for us at the gift shop,” he said. He then pulled a brown cowboy hat out of the bag and put it on, leaving some of his bed-head hair out to sweep his broad shoulders. He looked hot and I wondered if he ever wore a cowboy hat in Texas.

I really didn’t want to accept a gift from him, and I thought it best to tell him so. He’d already gone overboard with the roses. “Um, that’s nice and all, but I don’t really need a hat. Thanks anyway.”

Ignoring me, he slipped the hat on my head. “Yes you do. The sun will be beating down on us all the way down. It’s a five-hour ride on donkeys. This will keep the sun off your face.”

I looked in the mirror. “It doesn’t look too bad.”

“It’s cute…and it matches your outfit.”

“I look like a real cowgirl, huh?”

“Honey, I’d lasso you anytime.” He smiled and led me out the door before I could possibly object to him talking to me that way.