The One I Love
“Well, Thomas is the one who knows the business. He’s the one who is calling the shots for me. I’ve tried it on my own, for a long time now. If he says we need you, then I need you.”
He looks me in the eyes and the way he says it gets the storm raging in my stomach all worked up again.
I decide to go back to my food. I’ve been watching him spin his pasta on the fork using the spoon. I concentrate all my energy on doing that correctly. Nailed it! I exclaim in my head grinning at the fork like an idiot. I take a triumphant bite and then somehow manage to lean forward and put my elbow in my bowl of oil and vinegar.
He raises an eyebrow and I leave my elbow there. What’s the point of making a huge deal about it? I feel all the delicious little spices stuck on my arm. Slowly I raise the arm and catch the oil with my napkin. I think I’ve pulled off playing it off when the waitress appears from nowhere.
“I’ll get you some oil and vinegar your arm hasn’t been in ma’am,” she says and whisks the little bowl away.
Charlie is laughing at me. Without thinking about it I throw a meatball at him. It misses as he dodges it and lands on the lap of the woman sitting behind him. Somehow it went over her head and fell into her lap and she didn’t notice. My cheeks burn red and he’s laughing so hard now he’s crying.
I hope the woman ordered spaghetti and meatballs so she’ll think she’s the one that dropped the meatball and reserve myself to be less childlike for the rest of dinner. I am a teacher after all. What would my kids think of me acting this way? Even though I’m chastising myself I can’t stop grinning like a fool with Charlie.
When Charlie gets his laughter under control he pins me with his gaze. “So, let’s talk high school, you weren’t ever in any of the clubs and plays I was in,” he says.
“Well, you were only in everything, but I was in a play with you. You’ve just forgotten my epic performance.”
He looks puzzled and asks, “Which one. I’m sorry but I don’t remember you being in a play with me.”
“Well, it was the talk of the school.” I am acting pretty cocky and I have no clue why.
“Enlighten me, please.”
Sitting up straight I prepare to wow him with a story about my best performance ever.
“I played a bush. You literally put your foot on me when you were skipping around the stage playing Puck in Midsumm
ers.”
He looks at me as if he’s trying to remember. “I didn’t skip.”
“That’s all you have to say. I’m hurt you don’t remember how well my strong back took your foot on it. And you did skip.”
“I thought I put my foot on a rock. It was a manly skip.”
I can’t help it as I throw a piece of bread at him this time and nearly die as it ends up hitting a man as he walks by the table. Somehow the carbohydrate gods are with me and he doesn’t feel it.
It’s easy for me to forget why we’re here when I’m having fun. We have to talk about the singing though. It is the main reason he’s back in my life.
“So, tell me, Charlie. Why music?”
“What do you mean Addy, music is everything? It’s my life. There was never a choice. It was and always will be music.”
I try to think of a way to word it that won’t offend him but will get across what I mean.
“Okay but why do you want to pursue it like this, I mean try to go big or whatever?”
“It’s the only thing I’m passionate about. It’s the only thing I want to do. I want to leave my mark on this world and not just because I inherited a company from my father.”
“Fair enough. But, I need more time to think about it.” If somehow, he does become famous because he has a female high school music teacher singing with him then it will affect my life. I’ll be famous too. It’s not something I know I can handle.
“You do? How about this. Come by the studio tomorrow. Sit with me while I teach my students. See the passion there and you’ll understand.”
He looks directly into my eyes and I can tell it means a lot to him.
“You teach?”
“Yes, I do. Come by I’ll text you the address. Actually, hand me your phone.”