The Damaged (The Insiders Trilogy 2)

I bit out a harsh laugh. “I’d hoped it was a lie.”

His hand curved around the back of my neck. His voice murmured next to my ear. “It’s not, I’m sorry. But it is work-related and…” His chest rose, held, and lowered again. His fingers slid through my hair, pulling, tipping my head back so I could see his gaze. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you ahead of time.”

That sucked.

“It’s work-related?”

“Yes. Very much so.”

If it was work-related …

What could I say or do? Nothing. A whole big, fat nothing.

It didn’t quite feel right, but I had to accept it. If that’s what Kash said, that was the truth.

I flattened my hand against his chest, feeling how tight it was, his heat, and I felt his heart there. “Okay. I’ll deal, but it’ll suck.”

His hand smoothed out from my hair and ran down the length of my arm. He moved more firmly against me, into me, and we both stepped back to the wall. He was right there, pressing against me. Then his hands rose, resting against the wall on each side of my head, and he was all around me. Trapping me there.

“You going to tell me the real reason you were sick?”

My stomach rolled.

I lied. “That jealousy we just mentioned?”

His eyes went flat. “Try again.”

I frowned. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He lowered his head. His forehead almost rested against mine. He breathed out, “I know it’s not about Victoria. What’s really going on?”

The same sensation slid through me, the one I felt walking out of the biker bar, and other images flashed in my mind.

Talking to the counselor they sent me to.

Telling Kash I didn’t need to see a counselor.

Driving to school that first day.

Hoda accusing me of getting in the program because of Peter.

Hoda giving that information to the blogger.

Hoda giving another picture of us.

Me not telling Kash about that picture.

Just Hoda in general.

The crowds at school.

Knowing Camille Story did another blog post about me, about us.

Knowing every single student at my school saw that, and read that, and I was now a walking target.

I had four guards now. Not just two.

All those memories and images and words assaulted me. One after another.

But I swallowed over a lump, tried for a smile, and lied again. “I’m totally fine.”

Kash shook his head. “You’re lying through your teeth.”

A ball was in my stomach, and it began bouncing around. It was competing in an Olympic volleyball match, pinging all over me, racking my insides with punches and hits and bounces.

I was lying, but I drew in a ragged breath and I closed my eyes and I rested my forehead against his chest.

“I don’t know what it is, and I don’t want to find out, because when I do, I know I’m not ready to deal with it.”

Kash’s body softened. The tension vanished, and he cupped the back of my head again, his head lowering so his cheek rested against the side of my temple. His voice was a whisper. “Okay. But you will have to deal eventually, and I’ll be here.”

I grabbed ahold of him. Both hands fisted in his shirt, I tucked my head to the crook of his chest and arm and tried to burrow into him. My throat was full. I couldn’t say anything more because that “it” was right there, threatening to break open and spill out. And I knew I couldn’t handle it.

Not yet.

We heard a soft knock at the door.

“Hell.” Kash lifted his head and barked, “A minute.”

A second knock.

He cursed under his breath but pulled away and went to the door. Opening it, he stood there. “Someone better be dead.”

Someone said, “We got a problem. VIP.”

“What is it?”

There was silence.

I lifted my head, saw Scott there. He was handing something to Kash to look at, and a second later, Kash handed it back. “Give me a minute.”

Scott nodded.

Kash stepped back inside. The door closed, and he turned, staring at me.

I was waiting.

He didn’t say anything.

“What is it?”

“My guess, your classmate friend called in reinforcements. The guy from your class is in a heated confrontation with Matt right now.”

I jerked away from the wall. “Liam?”

Kash nodded, his mouth flattening, but I swear, I couldn’t tell if he was pissed off or trying not to laugh.

“Liam’s here?”

“So is my very recent ex-employee, along with one Camille Story.”

Kash waited a beat.

I connected the dots. “That blogger?”

He nodded.

I frowned. “Wait. Why isn’t Hoda banned from the premises?”

“She is.” His jaw clenched. A vein stuck out. “My guess is that’s why she brought her own reinforcements.”

I swore. “Camille Story.”

Another brief nod from him. “If it were me, the whole lot would be kicked out, but these are your classmates. What do you want done with them?”

I swore again. “I want to see what this bitch looks like. That’s what I want to do. I want to go home and I want to hack the fuck out of her.”