Welcome to Hell: Rediscovering First Love

Gemma nodded in agreement.

“You didn’t fight often but when you did look out,” Micki added. “You could hear her all over the neighborhood.”

“She would get you riled. That was the only time Pop that you raised your voice was when you argued with Yancy,” Adin said.

Pop agreed. His wife knew how to push his buttons. She liked a good fight every now and then. Yancy was passionate. Fighting got her blood going. They had great makeup sex but his girls didn’t need to know that.

“The tree was where Micki would go,” I said reminding my sister where she would hide.

“Don’t remind me,” she said. “Do you know once I went so high I was petrified? I didn’t think I would make it down.”

“Why did you put with her Pop?” Adin asked.

He looked shocked. We all looked shocked.

“Because like us he loved her with everything in him,” I answered huskily as if I might cry. “She was his pain in the ass.”

“A huge pain in the ass,” Micki agreed.

“But God could she make an impression,” Adin said as if mesmerized thinking about Yancy.

I felt a tear form in my eye and then it trickled down my face. “No one not even Kerry, Keegan or Sam loved me the way she did.”

Adin looked at me then she took my hand in hers and squeezed it lovingly. “No one loves you the way a mother does,” she stated sadly. “I hate you Gem and I hate you Gabrielle,” she added glaring at us both.

“Why?” Gem looked pained as she leaned forward so she could see Adin around Micki. Then she looked at me clearly confused.

“Because you are pregnant and don’t want to be. Because Gabby is pregnant again too. Sam is only three months old. Well nearly four. What is it with the three of you that you get pregnant without trying and I can’t get pregnant to save my soul?”

“Wow Gabby. Really?”

“Not a word Gemma,” I warned her.

“It will happen Adin,” Micki replied knowingly. “Give it time.” She patted my sister’s thigh under the blanket.

“You don’t understand,” my sister said.

Glancing at Adin’s hand that was still linked in Michaela’s, I said, “Adin we understand more than you realize. We’re your sisters. You’re hurting that is all we need to know. We hurt right along with you ju

st as the three of you were hurting with me at Yancy’s funeral.”

She looked at me with tears in her eyes. “You’re right.”

“Sometimes, I think we feel each other’s pain,” Micki declared. “There were times Gab when I called your house in Eden just because I couldn’t get you off my mind and some of those times James was doing something that was hurting you I knew by the sound of your voice.”

I turned toward Micki and gazed at her with understanding, “I know,” I told her. Many times when I had called her when I knew that something was going on with her and Byron and she needed me. I just somehow knew.

“I saw Harriet Mills the other day,” Adin said changing the subject. “She isn’t doing so well. She has had pneumonia this winter.” Adin paused. “Harriet looked so sad when she turned to walk away from me. Before she left Harriet told me how much she misses Yancy. Hell isn’t the same without her she told me. Can we invite her for dinner today? I think she’s lonely.”

We agreed to invite Harriet.

We were quiet then lost in thought. Harriet’s words rang in my brain again. My mother had been proud of the mother that I was. Nothing was the same without Yancy. Kerry came into the room in snug fitting jeans and a tee shirt carrying Sam who was fussing and wanted to be fed. The sight of my husband made me tingly all over.

“Good morning ladies,” he said sleepily. “Do you four have radar so that when one gets up the others do too?” He leaned over kissed me on the mouth and then deposited our son in my arms.

“Sleep well?” Adin teased Kerry.

“Actually no,” he replied still grumpy about his daughter’s activities.