Sex, Not Love

Hunter’s voice was solemn, and he reached for my hand. “I won’t be flying back either. Job here in New York will be wrapped up before the christening. My two-month assignment will be done. I’ll be home in California.”

Wow. That hurt. He wasn’t being mean or harsh in any way. In fact, the softness of his tone and the way he’d reached out to touch my hand showed me he knew what the reminder would do to me. But that barely dulled the edginess I felt. I was upset—not necessarily with him. I was upset with myself for letting it bother me so much.

Our relationship had been temporary since the beginning. I’d gone into it with my eyes open. The only problem was, somewhere along the way, I’d also opened up my heart.

Hunter said something and waited for me to respond. I blinked myself back out of my thoughts. “I’m sorry. What did you say?”

“I said, maybe you and Izzy can stay with me for the long weekend?”

“Sure.” I forced a smile. “We’ll see.”

For the next twenty or so minutes, I went through the motions of hanging out with Derek and Hunter. I smiled and laughed, but inside, I was waging the battle of head vs. heart. My head was yelling, He’s leaving—who cares? And my heart was answering—You do, dumbass. You do.

Luckily, we all had plans for the evening, and they didn’t entail spending much more time with each other. Hunter and Derek had the Knicks game, and I needed to head to Mom’s.

“I have to get to dinner. I’m so glad we got to see each other, Derek.” I stood. “Thank you for having me as Caroline’s godmother. Please give my best friend a giant hug for me when you get home.”

Derek stood and gave me a hug. “I will. And I’ll see you next month.”

I turned to Hunter, grateful for a public goodbye and quick escape. “Give me a call,” I said very noncommittally.

Hunter spoke to Derek. “Give me a few minutes. I’m going to walk Natalia out, and then we’ll head to the game.”

“Sure thing.”

So much for a quick escape. With his hand on my lower back, Hunter guided me out of the bar.

I looked at my feet, not wanting him to see what I was feeling written all over my face.

But he cupped my face and pressed his forehead against mine. “I’m sorry if I upset you.”

“You didn’t,” I said. But not even my own ears believed me.

He waited me out, knowing eventually I’d have to look up. When our eyes finally met, he spoke into mine. “I care about you, Natalia. It’s not going to be easy for me to leave either. This last month and a half has been great…” His eyes crinkled at the corners. “Especially the last few weeks since I wore you down.”

Maybe hearing that I wasn’t alone should’ve made me feel better. But it was the unsaid that cloaked a feeling of melancholy over me like a suit of armor. It was going to be hard on him to leave…but he wasn’t considering staying either. Nor was there any mention of attempting something long distance. This was over when our time was up.

I forced a small smile. “I’ll give you a call.”

He looked into my eyes, briefly closing his before nodding. “Okay.”

His lips covered mine in a gentle kiss before going to my forehead for another. “Be careful on the trains.”

“Have fun at the game.”

It was difficult to walk away, but I knew I needed to be the one to do it. I felt Hunter’s eyes on me the entire walk down the block to the train station, certain he stayed outside the restaurant to watch me. But I didn’t turn around to check. That was how it was going to have to be between us—I’d need to walk away since he wasn’t going to do anything to stick around in my life.

Chapter 27

Natalia

I hadn’t seen Hunter in five days.

To most couples, that might be normal. Weekdays are busy. I have a teenager to take care of. Then again, we weren’t really a couple, were we? Since Hunter and I had gotten together, we’d never been apart this long. We’d grab a bite to eat, catch one of Izzy’s games, steal a few hours in his bedroom, or even meet for breakfast. It had never been an effort to find the time. Until now. And it wasn’t a lack of effort on his part. I was avoiding him, and he knew it—although he hadn’t yet called me out on it.

But I had a feeling that was about to change as I pressed the buzzer to unlock the front door downstairs. After five days of me saying I was busy and delaying answering his texts, he’d showed up unannounced at my apartment this morning. Conveniently, Izzy had just left for school, and he knew I rarely had appointments before ten o’clock.

I unlocked my apartment door and waited. Hunter stepped off the elevator and walked toward me with purpose. It pissed me off that my body reacted to seeing him when I didn’t want to be excited. And that anger was evident in my snarky tone.