The War of Two Queens (Blood and Ash 4)

He sat back, eyeing me as he rested his ankle on his knee. “You have that look.”

“What look?”

“The one that says you have a question you’re trying not to ask.”

“No, I don’t.”

Kieran arched a brow.

I sighed, thinking it was rather annoying that he knew me so well. Needing courage to ask what I wanted to know, I took a longer drink. It did very little to aid me. “What…what kind of love do you feel?”

He studied me until I almost started squirming in the chair. “There are many kinds of love, but when it comes to you, it’s the kind that allowed me to make that—” He inhaled sharply, his jaw hardening. “It’s the kind of love that allowed me to make that promise to you, Poppy. It’s the same kind of love that allowed you to ask that of me.”

Casteel

The bedchamber was dimly lit when I entered. Kieran’s scent lingered by the fireplace, where two empty glasses sat on a small table. Stripping off the weapons and straps that held them in place, I left all but one dagger on the chest by the standing screen.

My heart gave an unsteady leap when I looked at the bed and saw Poppy there, curled on her side, the blanket pooled at her waist and her robe loosened, baring one creamy shoulder. As I stripped off my clothing and made quick use of the cooled bathwater, I didn’t think my heart would ever stop giving little jumps whenever I looked upon her. Didn’t think I would ever get used to looking at her and knowing that I was hers and she was mine.

I made sure I was completely dry before stepping toward the bed. I didn’t want to wake her—well, that was a lie. I wanted to see those beautiful eyes. Have her gift me with one of her smiles. Hear her voice. Her laugh. So, yeah, I wanted her awake, but the morning would come soon enough. We all needed our rest, for the journey into the Blood Forest wouldn’t be an easy one. Carefully pulling back the blanket, I eased into bed and kept my godsdamn hands and arms to myself. If I touched her, then yeah, I would spend the night staring at the ceiling with a hard cock.

Forcing my eyes closed and my breathing to steady, by some kind of miracle, I fell asleep. I didn’t know how long I rested before I found myself in that musty and dark cell, scratching Craven claws and the rattling of chains the only sounds. The band at my throat was almost too tight to swallow or breathe deeply, and the pain in my hand and in—

I woke with a jolt, my eyes flying open to see shadows swaying across the exposed beams of the ceiling. I’m not there. My heart thumped. I’m here. Air wheezed in and out of my lungs as I repeated those words like a fucking prayer.

The bed shifted slightly as I dragged my hands down my face, feeling the roughness of calluses—of what was absent there.

Poppy rolled toward me, pressing the length of her half-clothed body against mine. “I missed you,” she murmured.

Fuck.

My heart.

Her voice.

It calmed me.

Lowering my hands, I curled an arm around her back, soaking in her warmth and softness. “I missed you.”

She wiggled in closer, sliding a leg between mine. “Did you talk with your father?”

“Long enough to tell him that whatever he felt he needed to say, it had to wait.” I tangled my fingers in her hair. “He wasn’t happy to hear that, but he backed off.”

“So, you didn’t really talk to him at all.”

“I don’t want whatever he has to say in my head right now,” I admitted. Nothing he could say at the moment would make me understand why he and my mother had kept the Blood Queen’s identity from us. “Not when there’s everything else—finding Malec. Meeting with Isbeth. Ending the war.”

Her hand slid over my chest. “I can understand that.” She yawned softly. “It’s why I didn’t ask Malik any more questions about that night in Lockswood or about Coralena and Leo.”

I glanced down at the top of her head. She wasn’t ready for whatever Malik had to share. Just as I wasn’t when it came to my brother and our father. “You should go back to sleep.”

“I will.” But that hand of hers drifted down my stomach.

“That doesn’t feel like you’re going back to sleep.”

Poppy didn’t say anything for a few moments. “Are you okay?”

Had my nightmare reached her? Or had she woken and simply sensed the lingering mess of emotions? Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath. When I didn’t answer, when I couldn’t, she turned her head, pressing a kiss to my chest.

“You will be,” she whispered.

“Yeah, I will be.”

“I know.” Her hand slid under the blanket.