Fuck It (Yama Yama)

Kasha’s eyes widen and dart to mine. I wonder if she can see the fear in them. He’s not supposed to love me. This is supposed to be a friends with benefits situation. He can’t love me.

His loud snores fill the air, and I shrug. “He’s high. Doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Probably won’t even remember it later.”

Roman glances at Kasha before turning his gaze to me. “He may not remember, but guys don’t volunteer those three words, drunk or sober, unless it’s really how they feel.”

I don’t know what to say to that so I just shake my head. A few minutes later, we’re docked, and two paramedics arrive. Simon is whisked away into the ambulance, and I insist on riding with him.

By the time they take Simon back to be scanned, and usher me to a waiting room, everyone is there. Kasha, Roman, Henley, Davis, Sicily, Anderson, and Bobby Jo all look up at me expectantly when I enter.

“He’s still out of it. The doctor says it’s not that uncommon and he’ll be okay. He might need surgery to repair a few blood vessels, though. They’ll come out and let me know.”

Sicily surprises me by sitting beside me and squeezing my hand. “It’s not your fault. I’m sure he won’t blame you.”

Is my guilt that obvious? “He might not, but I did it to him.”

“Take it from someone who knows. Bad sex happens. It’s true I’ve never turned a guy’s dick into a Twizzler, but…”

Kasha lets out a snort of laughter. “I’m sorry…I just…it’s not me for once. This is so something that could happen to me.”

“It better fucking not,” Roman grunts, covering his crotch. “You aren’t riding me anymore.”

A young surgeon wearing green scrubs enters and asks, “Are you the family of Simon Carr?”

“Yes,” I lie, getting to my feet. “I’m his wife. Will he be okay?” I know how hospitals are. They won’t tell us anything unless there’s a family member present.

Ignoring my lack of a ring, the surgeon smiles. “I need to put him under and repair two blood vessels. He’ll have to refrain from sexual activity for six to eight weeks until he fully recovers.”

He’s going to fucking kill me.

“Is he awake? Can I see him?”

“He’s already being prepped for surgery. The nurse will let you know when he’s out and you can see him in the recovery room.”

“Thank you.” I return to my seat to wait. The guys leave to take Bobby Jo and Sicily back to the mansion while Henley and Kasha stay with me. Roman promises to return soon.

Finally, he’s out of recovery, and they let me sit with him while he comes out of the anesthesia.

Blinking against the invading light, he turns his head and looks at me. “Lydia?”

“Right here. You came through the surgery great. You’re going to be fine.”

Confusion wrinkles his forehead, then his memory catches up, and he groans. “My dick. Sideways.”

“Not anymore.”

He struggles to sit up and looks under the covers. “Can’t tell anything. It’s all bandaged up.”

“Leave it alone,” I caution, grabbing his hand when he reaches under the blanket. “You have stitches.”

“This is a nightmare.”

The doctor enters just in time to hear him say it, and he chuckles. “It’s not the way I’d want to spend my day either, but it isn’t as bad as you think. Full function will return within a few days, and you’ll be able to resume a normal sex life in six to eight weeks. You’ll want to avoid getting an erection for the next couple of weeks, though. It’ll be painful.”

“When can I go home?”

“In a few hours.”

The doctor signs something on his chart and leaves the room, whistling.

“I’m so sorry, Simon. I don’t know what happened.” I squeeze his hand and lay my head on his arm.

His hand rests on the back of my head. “It was an accident, Lyd. It’s not your fault.”

A curt knock sounds at the door just before Roman walks through it. “Hey, Frankendick. How are you feeling?”

Simon glares at him. “Fuck off.”

Roman holds up his palms. “Hey, I’m not the one who went all Hulk smash on your junk. I just wanted to let you know you have the next week off work to recover. Let me know if you need more time.”

He turns to me and hands me a set of keys. “Monica’s car is parked in the emergency lot. I’m going to take the others back to the mansion. Do you want me to come back and help you get him home when he’s released?”

“No, we’ll be fine.”

Roman’s smile is knowing as he looks back and forth between us, probably recalling the drugged out I love you Simon offered a few hours ago.

“Yeah, I think you will.”

CHAPTER 13

LYDIA

Simon drifts in and out of consciousness as the anesthesia wears off. When he falls asleep again, I step out into the hall to ask a nurse where the nearest pharmacy is located. The doctor left him a prescription for an anti-inflammatory to keep the swelling down, plus a painkiller to get him through the next couple of days. Something tells me the ride home isn’t going to be a pleasant one so I’m glad he at least has something to help.