The Man She Should Have Married

‘More like exploit them,’ he said coldly.

‘How dare you?’ She felt her face dissolving in shock. ‘They’re like family to me.

‘Paid family.’ He shook his head slowly, the green of his eyes sharp like broken glass.

‘Yes—paid. Like me.’ Her voice was shaking. ‘I have a role here too, Farlan. And responsibilities. And a vision that’s every bit as important to me as your films are to you. Only you don’t understand that, or like it, or value it, and that’s why I broke up with you.’

It was suddenly difficult to speak past the lump in her throat.

‘Nia—’

She put up a hand. ‘I know my parents. They are snobs, and they’re difficult, and sometimes I don’t like them very much but I knew they would come round in the end. Only then I thought about what that would really mean. I knew that you loved me, and that you would give up everything for me, just like I was going to do for you, only I knew how unhappy that would make you, and I couldn’t do that to you,’ she whispered.

Lowering her head, she hugged her knees to her chest.

‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ She heard his intake of breath, and then two strong arms curved beneath her. ‘No, you don’t need to answer that.’

She felt Farlan’s lips brush against her hair.

‘I know why. I didn’t give you a chance.’

His arms tightened around her.

‘I’m sorry. I should have let you talk on the phone that day, but I was so furious, and hurt…’

He sounded defensive.

Looking up, she saw that his mouth was set in a grim line. ‘I know,’ she said. ‘I should never have told you on the phone. I was going to come to the station, but then, when I heard your voice, I couldn’t bear it, so I told you, and you were so angry. I couldn’t think of the words I needed to say, and then you just hung up—’

There was a long silence. A muscle was working in his cheek.

‘I tried to call you back,’ she said. ‘I tried so many times. But your phone—’

‘I threw it away.’ He smiled humourlessly. ‘Big mistake. My whole life was on that phone.’

Her eyes slid away from his. So many misunderstandings.

‘I’m sorry.’ She felt sick. ‘I made a mess of everything.’

She felt his fingers touch her face, tilt up her chin.

‘We made a mess of everything. Maybe if we’d been older, or if we’d waited a bit longer or gone travelling first—’

But it was more than that. It was easy to blame their break-up on tiny individual decisions, but none of that would have mattered if they’d been meant to be together.

Lovers who were at cross-purposes didn’t stay lovers for long for one obvious reason. For a relationship to work, you needed to be able to communicate with each other, and she and Farlan had only ever communicated effectively on one level.

Her heart skipped a beat and, looking up, she found him watching her, his gaze steady and unblinking. A current of heat spiralled up inside her.

For a moment neither of them moved.

‘Nia…’

He spoke her name softly and she felt her mouth turn dry.

‘What happened in the car—’

‘Shouldn’t have happened,’ she said quickly.