The Life - Rebirth (The Life 4)

“I can do it.” I didn’t snap when she tried to help, but my tone let her know I meant business. I was still holding onto my cool in front of our kids because I was not about to scare them with my anger, and besides, that anger had turned into something else a while ago. Hasty decisions made in anger are a fool’s domain; I refuse to be a fool.

Lance showed up with a bag from the pharmacy filled to almost overflowing. I didn’t bother laughing at him because I would’ve done the same. “They only had a few to choose from; I grabbed like three each of what they had. I got some shampoo too, is the water cold?” He seemed really worried about that.

“No, Uncle Lance, you did good.” He looked like I’d given him an award.

I’m not sure why but seeing him so happy to help led me to question who’d been there for them their whole lives. Who used to make those runs to the store for her when I wasn’t around? “You guys need help? Or….”

“No, I’ve got it, thanks. Where are you off to?”

“I was actually at Nana’s and Gramps’, but I think I’ll head home now.”

It didn’t hit me until after he left, but why was he over there? Not that he hasn’t been before, but with Natalia and Jr. there now…. hmm, maybe he’s helping out in some way knowing him. I’m not sure at this point if I was ignoring her or she was ignoring me, but we hadn’t said two words to each other the whole time I was taking the kids into their bath.

Or maybe she was enjoying the setup as it unfolded. No sooner had I put the kids in the tub than mayhem ensued. They splashed each other poked at each other, but it was the talking that freaked me out, just a little bit. They weren’t babbling incoherently, not the way you’d expect someone so tiny to do but speaking in complete sentences.

Now I found something else to be pissed about. She’s had a head start; now I’ve got to get my hands on any and all publications about babies. I wasn’t exactly scared because I live for challenges, but this was a little bit different; this involved precious little innocents. My precious little innocents.

Every time I think of what could’ve happened, how I could be on my way to death without ever knowing of their existence, I get a pit in my chest. Emotion got to be too much, and I kissed each of their little heads before glaring over at their mother, who was hovering in the doorway. “Do you know what I’m going to do to you once they’ve gone to sleep?”

GIANNA

I’m not going to lie; I wanted to run. Forget cousin Colton’s game plan. Forget everything else; just take the kids and high tail it back to Alaska. The look in his eyes when he said that did not bode well for me. I was caught in the midst of too many emotions to tackle them all at once, and the funny thing is, I haven’t even had time to focus on any one thing since I opened the door to him earlier.

Things have not at all gone the way I’d imagined them in my head. I don’t know what made me think that Gabriel would be rational, maybe because the boy I left here almost three years ago had been so blissfully calm and wise, even though he had a streak of the vengeful in him. But that had never been turned against me.

I was the one he protected and cossetted. I’ve never felt anything but safe in his presence, knowing that even if the rest of the world had to be wary of him, that would never be me. Now I’m not so sure. There was no real inflection in his voice when he made the threat; in fact, had I not seen the intent in his eyes, I wouldn’t have known that it was a threat.

Now I’m trapped here like Bambi in headlights. Why do the tables keep turning? One minute I feel I have the upper hand, and the next, he snatches it away from me again. I mean, it’s pretty cut and dry. I don’t see how he could have any anger towards me for doing exactly what he’d asked of me. Okay, maybe I should’ve told him about the babies. I could’ve found a way to contact him just like I’d done with grandma, but I was too afraid that he’d use it to find me, find us.

How can he so easily forget that he’s the one who sent me away? And then there’s that, that one story that has already destroyed my anger and filled me with guilt, the story that Colton had told about Gabriel’s mother and the man who violated her. My quick understanding as to why he’d found it necessary to send me away had eaten away at the anger I’d been holding onto for so long.