You Don't Own Me (The Russian Don 1)

I smile to think what her reaction will be when I give her the Jimmy Choos. She takes them out of the box, and kicking off her shoes immediately tries them on.

‘Oh wow!’ she says, standing up. She turns her foot this way and that to admire the shoes. Then she walks up and down the restaurant before coming back to our table and sitting down.

‘Thank you,’ she gushes. ‘They look really expensive though.’

‘Well,’ I say. ‘Remember that personal dresser I told you about. She sources them all from Hong Kong for a fraction of the price you would pay in Britain.’

Her eyes nearly pop out of her face. ‘Did you get the name of her source?’ she gasps.

I grin at her. ‘Do you think I’m stupid? Of course, I did.’

She leans forward. ‘Do they have a website?’

‘Not yet. I think at the moment she’s just doing it on the sly without the tax authorities knowing about it. I’ve got her phone number though.’

‘Well, go on then,’ she says.

I text the number to her phone.

When her phone pings with my message, she says, ‘I miss you a lot, you know, D. Even more than I thought I would.’

‘Me too,’ I say immediately because I do. I really do miss Stella’s warmth and laughter and easy chatter.

She looks at me as if she is about to cry.

‘I’ll be home soon, you’ll see,’ I promise blithely. It never even occurs to me then that I could be wrong. That I might never live with her again. That my life could dive into chaos and total darkness of a kind I could never imagine.

We order our food and she drops her little bombshell.

‘I’m going on a date tomorrow night.’

‘Wow! Who with?’ I ask.

She shrugs. ‘Just some guy. I’m not really that interested, but I figure I’ll have to start somewhere.’

I reach out a hand and squeeze her forearm. ‘I’m proud of you. You told yourself you were going to get over Zane and you went out and started the process.’

‘Yeah,’ she says unenthusiastically.

‘Look, it’s almost certain that this is not the guy for you, but the main thing is you’ve told yourself mentally that you’re available again and that’s like a taxi driver putting his taxi light on. Now someone can flag you.’

She bends her head, chews on her lower lip, then looks up at me pitifully. ‘So how is Zane?’

I want to tell her how sorry I am that it all worked out so bad for her, but I know she doesn’t want to be pitied. Besides, very soon it will be me in her shoes when Zane moves on to his new flavor of the month.

‘He’s all right,’ I say softly.

‘How’s it going between the two of you?’ she asks, in a voice that tells me she desperately wants to know and yet she hates herself for being weak enough to ask.

I decide to be truthful. The last time I didn’t tell her because I thought I was protecting her we nearly fell out. ‘The sex is like nothing I’ve known, really out of this world, but to be honest I don’t know what to think, babe. He kind of blows hot and cold on me. Every time I think we’re making progress he goes and pulls the rug out from under my feet.’

‘Why?’

‘I think it’s because he is determined to keep our arrangement as impersonal as possible.’

She frowns and nods. ‘I see.’

‘Yeah,’ I sigh.

She stares at me incredulously. ‘Oh fuck! You’re falling in love with him, aren’t you?’

I look at her sadly. ‘I can’t help it, Stel. I’m pretending I’m fine, but I’m shit scared of what is going to happen when my month is up. It feels as if I’m in a lift where the cables have snapped and I just can’t stop myself from falling.’

That evening I take a long time over my make-up and hair. Then I zip up my red, high necked, floor-length gown and look at myself in the mirror. My hair is up and I have glamorous drop earrings on. Molly did a fine job.

I do look good.

Zane is taking me to see Yo-Yo Ma live in concert. I don’t know if I will enjoy the performance because I’m not really into classical music. In fact, the only reason I even know Yo-Yo Ma exists is because I once had a pretentious boyfriend who had the Bach Cello Suite No. I Prelude as his phone’s ring tone. At first it seemed boring but after a while I started to like it.

I come down the stairs and Zane is waiting at the end of them. He is sexy and incredibly handsome in a black tux. His eyes lock on mine and never let go. I reach the second last step and am standing six inches away from him.