Breath of Scandal

“He’s upstairs with Hutch, in his bedroom.”

He jogged up the sweeping staircase and opened the second door on his left past the gallery. Neal was sitting on the floor, his back propped against the bed. Hutch was slouched in an easy chair. Remarkably, Neal looked the same as always. Hutch’s freckles seemed to have turned darker overnight. Or was it that his skin beneath them was unnaturally pale? The scratch on his cheek stood out in stark contrast.

“Hi,” Neal said. “Come in. Want a beer?”

“No, thanks.”

Hutch said nothing. They made brief eye contact, but, because of the sinful secret they now shared, it was difficult for Lamar to look directly at his friends. Apparently Hutch felt the same.

Neal appeared unfazed. “How was school today, Lamar?”

“Okay, I guess.”

“Anything momentous happen?” He took a swig of his beer.

“No.” After a brief pause, he said, “Mr. Patterson announced that Gary and… and Jade got college scholarships.” He shot Hutch a furtive glance. Hutch blanched paler than before.

“You don’t say?” Neal drawled. “How ’bout that? Good for them.”

Hutch bounded out of the easy chair and moved to the window. In his wake, he left a string of curses. Regarding Hutch, Neal took another sip of his beer. “What’s eating your ass? Aren’t you glad about their scholarships?” Laughter lay just beneath his words.

Angrily Hutch spun around. “Aren’t we even going to talk about it? Are we just going to pretend nothing happened?”

Now that Hutch had broached the subject, Lamar was relieved that he could finally talk about it with someone. “Jesus, I’ve been scared shitless all day.”

“Scared? Of what?” Neal asked scoffingly.

“Of getting into trouble, what do you think?”

Neal sat up straighter, shaking his head as though puzzled by Lamar’s concern. “Like I told you last night, we aren’t going to get into trouble. Don’t you listen to me when I tell you something, Lamar? We didn’t do anything wrong.”

Lamar glanced at Hutch. Hutch wasn’t as complacent about the situation as Neal was, but he wouldn’t speak up at the risk of appearing cowardly and getting on Neal’s bad side. Lamar was on his own.

Lamar grabbed his diminishing bravery with both hands and held on. “Some people might see it different, Neal.”

“What people?”

“People who hear about it.”

“Who’s gonna tell? Jade?” He snorted. “Hardly.”

Hutch said, “She told my daddy.”

“She told your daddy?” Lamar repeated in a high, squeaky voice. His knees gave out beneath him and he dropped to the floor with a thud. “What’d he do?”

“Not a goddamn thing!” Neal, obviously annoyed, stood up and tore another can of beer from the six-pack. When he opened it, the foamy head bubbled over his hand. As he shook off the suds, he said, “You two really piss me off, you know? If you go around looking and acting guilty of something, everybody’ll think you are.”

“Maybe we are.” Neal’s eyes cut to Lamar. Lamar felt like an insect being pinned to a piece of Styrofoam, but he had to get this off his chest or burst. “No matter what you say, Neal, I don’t think Jade wanted us to… you know.”

“Are you nuts?” The words rushed from Hutch’s mouth as though they’d been building up from internal pressure. “Of course she didn’t want us to, you idiot. She fought like a hellcat. We raped her, pure and simple.”

“Oh, Jesus.” Lamar slumped to one side. His bowels felt watery. He feared he might mess himself. He thought he might vomit again. But if he disgraced himself, so what? He was going to die anyway the minute his mother got wind of the crime.

“Shut up!” Neal hissed. “Both of you, just shut up.” His straight, white teeth were clenched and bared. “Listen, you dumb fucks, girls pull this bullshit all the time. She put up token resistance, sure. Do you think she wants us telling everybody that she was willingly gangbanged? Before we could advertise to all the other guys how easy she was, she had to pull this crap to make us look bad first. Don’t you see that?”

Hutch looked desperate enough to grasp at any straw, no matter how flimsy. Lamar too wanted to believe Neal, but every time Neal began to sound logical, Lamar remembered the strength with which Jade had fought and how terrified she had looked when he and Hutch held her down for Neal.

Hutch wiped his perspiring forehead with the back of his hand. His skin was the color of putty speckled with rusty paint. “We probably shouldn’t have left her there.”