Etching Our Way (Broken Tracks 1)

For the last six years, I’ve made sure that I’ve been there at the same time that she passed. I don’t know why I do it; why I only go at that time, but it’s always felt like the right thing to do.

“Tris?” I snap my head to the side, my eyes catching Mom’s where she stands beside me. “You okay?” she asks, her eyes filled with understanding. Things have been easier between us lately, and I think that it’s mainly because I’ve let things go. Being around Harmony again has opened my eyes to how I was acting and how I was treating people.

I give her a sad smile. “Yeah.”

> She lays her hand on my arm, squeezing lightly. “It’s a hard day. It always will be, and you’re allowed to mourn her. But you also need to celebrate her life. She wouldn’t want you to mope around.”

I bite my bottom lip as her words roll around my head. It doesn’t matter how many times she tells me this, I never feel right celebrating her life. It was cut short, she wasn’t even thirty and she left behind a toddler and newborn baby. There’s nothing there to celebrate and hearing her say those words only serve to annoy me.

“Dad! I’m starvvving!”

“Burgers are nearly ready,” I announce, winking at Clay where he’s sitting with a bun on his plate, open and ready for his burger while he stares at the grill as I open it up.

“Tris—”

“Not now, Mom,” I warn her.

She holds her hands up, backing away and going to sit back at the table next to Harmony as I flip the burgers and watch the coal burn, becoming fascinated by the way that the color changes. Everything fades away as I stare at them, stuck inside my own head and working on autopilot as I plate the burgers up and place them in the middle of the table.

Amelia gathers all of the kids, sitting them down and helping them plate up the food while I go back to the grill, cooking more food than necessary. I need a moment to gather myself before Izzie has finished her burger and is demanding to open her presents.

I drop my head, taking a deep breath before turning back around and pasting a smile on my face as I walk over to the table and sit next to Izzie, seeing that she’s already demolished half of her burger.

“Presents?” she asks, grinning and spreading ketchup up her cheek.

“After you’ve eaten, pumpkin.”

She nods and draws her brows down, sheer determination on her face as she picks up the rest of her burger, taking two huge bites and chewing as fast as she can before standing up and walking over to the table the presents are on.

“Open mine first, Izzie!” Nate shouts, bouncing up and down in his seat. His crown wobbles on the top of his head but he doesn’t even notice until it’s falling off and landing on the table, causing his drink to splatter all over him. “Oh sh—sugar!” He jumps up, pulling his t-shirt away from his chest.

Everyone’s silent for point two seconds before Clay snorts, laughter bursting out of him as he throws his head back.

“Uncle Nate!” Izzie reprimands him, her hands on her hips as she stands in front of all of her presents. “You need to be more careful!”

“Yes, Princess Izzie,” he says, his head down in mock shame, but I see the smirk on his face.

“Just because of that, I’ll be opening yours last.”

“Awww, come on!” Nate throws his hands up in the air, slipping down in his seat and pouting.

Amelia leans forward, a smirk on her face. “The pouting prince.” She pats his hand.

“That’s it!” Nate stands up, his chair flipping back as he runs around the table toward Izzie, picking her up before running around the backyard as he shouts, “If you don’t open mine, then I’m going to take you prisoner!”

“Miss J! Save me!”

My gaze flicks over to Harmony as she places her drink down gently on the table and slowly stands up. “Nathan Cole, put the birthday girl down and let her open her presents, or I’ll show everyone the picture of your long flowing princess hair from college.” She puts her hands on her hips and smirks.

“You wouldn’t,” he gasps, standing still with a squirming Izzie in his arms.

“Hellllp!”

Harmony takes a step toward him and Nate watches her carefully as I stand, creeping around the edge of the grass; Harmony’s gaze flicks to me and I point at Nate. Her lips quirk up before she walks toward Nate again, keeping his attention focused on her as I get closer.

I lift my finger to my lips as Izzie sees me and she tries to wink at me but fails, instead it looks like she is closing both eyes and squeezing them shut before opening them again. It nearly has me bursting out with laughter but I manage to keep my composure before diving at Nate and taking Izzie out of his arms.

“I saved the princess!” I announce, holding her up in the air like a trophy.