Savage Saints (Monsters of Saint Mark's)

“From the source code?” Her mouth is still open.

“Yeah. Why? What’s the big deal?”

“So it’s… real?”

“What?”

Talina just blinks at me, mouth still open.

“What?” I exclaim.

“You’re… her!”

“Who?”

“Oh. My. Gods.” Talina places a hand over her heart and then almost falls over. I catch her just in time and lead her over to a chair. She sinks into it, breathless.

“What’s wrong?”

But she can’t speak. In fact, she’s panting really hard. She might be hyperventilating.

“Talina! Talk to me! What’s happening here?”

She looks up at me, eyes wide, then she slips down to her knees and bows at my feet.

“What the hell are you doing?”

She doesn’t get up. She’s pressing her freaking face to the cold tile floor. “Forgive me. Forgive me, Your Highness! I didn’t know! He never told me!”

“What. The actual fuck! Are you talking about!” I yell it. Loud.

She looks up at me. “Your Highness?”

“Stop calling me that! I’m Pie! I’m not a highness anything, I’m just Pie!”

“Pie.” She wilts, then bows her head back to the floor again.

“Stop it! Right now!”

“I’m sorry!” She looks up. “I’m sorry!”

“What are you doing?”

“You don’t know, do you? You really don’t know.”

“I don’t know shit! I’ve been telling you people that all freaking day!”

She gets to her feet, grabs my hand, kisses my fucking fingers, and says, “Princess Pianna! Welcome home!”

I slap her. Right across the face. So hard it makes a smacking noise that echoes up to the ceiling. And then I yell, “Snap out of it!”

I saw this in a movie once. It was effective.

But today, it makes Talina cry.

Shit. “Oh, my God. I’m so sorry, Talina. I just want you to stop acting weird. I’m not a princess. I’m a freaking… schizophrenic nobody! My name isn’t Pianna!”

Like… gross, right? Pie is cute. Pianna is just… no. Gross.