Admire Me (Rough Edges 2)

“Okay, talk to me. What’s going on?” He lays his cards down and gives me his full attention.

“Well, obviously you’re aware we’ve been seeing each other practically every day since we met. But yesterday, she mentioned we might be moving too fast. She said she wants to play it by ear. What does that even mean?” I shake my head. Trying to decipher what women say sometimes can be impossible.

“Honestly, maybe she is just feeling a little overwhelmed. I know when Tessa showed up in my life, it terrified me. I didn’t think I was ready to open up to her, and things started to escalate and before I knew it, she was a part of my life whether I wanted her to be or not. Sometimes we don’t get to choose who we fall in love with, and that’s the best part.”

So maybe Harper is just as scared, as am I. Neither of us want to get our hearts broken, but I don’t plan on hurting or breaking up with her.

“Just let her express her fears, and acknowledge them. Do whatever she needs,” Damon says.

I take out my phone and text her.

Me: Let’s go out to dinner tonight. Pick you up at 7?

There are some things that we should discuss and it will be easier for both of us if we aren’t at her house. After drinking some wine, and getting cozy on the couch, I don’t want to fall asleep again and overstep. She did bring up me staying over already, and so I need to be diligent about not staying over.

Harper: I’ll see you then. =)

The rest of my shift flies by, and then I’m at my house, showering and getting ready to take her to dinner. Tonight will be more about getting to know where she’s at, and what she wants going forward. I want to get a handle on how she is feeling, and make sure she knows I’m not pressuring her into anything.

After the shower, I grab a plain blue button-up and dark jeans and decide to throw on my dress shoes, too. You can never look too good for a date, right? I run a comb through my hair, take a couple minutes to blow dry so I didn’t drip everywhere.

Let’s go get the girl.

On the drive over, I remind myself of what tonight is supposed to accomplish and when I pull up it’s like she’s been watching for me, already coming out of her house in a red dress and black pumps. The things you do to me.

I get out and open the door for her, like every man should. “That dress is wonderful.”

It’s hard to keep my eyes on the road when her thighs are exposed and just begging me to kiss them. I shake my head, trying to get the dirty thoughts out of my head for now because tonight is not about sex.

“So, this was last minute. Just couldn’t resist seeing me tonight, huh?” Harper asks, smiling.

Okay, so maybe she’s right. “Why you gotta call me out like that? Can’t a guy just have dinner with a beautiful woman?”

“Of course. I’m not complaining. Plus, I love to see you dressed up. It’s sexy.” She smiles and winks at me.

Once we get to Rolando’s Cuisine and get a table, she just sits there and stares at me, but not in a creepy way. In more of a loving way.

“So, I figured we should talk about yesterday. You mentioned us going too fast and I just don’t want you to feel pressured by me. Are there rules you want to follow?” I ask.

She laughs and takes my hand in hers, “Listen. It’s more scary to me that we are progressing fast, and I’m already breaking my rules for you. We’ve been on five dates now counting this one, and my feelings are...”

“Are what?” I ask.

“Let’s just say we might have only known each for a week, but it feels like months. And I know that sounds childish,” she continues to talk, but I stop her.

“Same. I think it’s because we talked about things upfront, instead of waiting. Knowing things about you makes me feel closer to you.”

She leans in and kisses me.

“If we ever need to slow down, don’t be scared to voice it. There is no pressure to hang out with me or for sex. Just want to get to know you, and go out to nice dinners like this as often as possible.”

“Perfect.”

Harper spends the night making me laugh and telling me about the kids in her class, bitching and moaning about having to speak in class, or being called on to read from the textbook. I know she just started, but she shows such a passion for the subject itself. I failed Chemistry in High School, so I can promise I know nothing about it, and hope to god I never have to worry about it ever again. Yet, I will listen to her talk about it, because that’s what I’m supposed to do, be encouraging and supportive.

Tessa somehow gets brought up, and then the wedding. We both express how stressed out she seems, and that someone needs to step in and help her move forward. The venue needs to be decided so all of us can get started on our duties.

“I’ll talk to her tomorrow. We’re having lunch. Maybe I can work some magic and get her to finally come to a conclusion.”