Love You Better (Better Love 1)

“Was it about Ivy?” she asks quietly. “That how he tried to get to you?”

“Yeah.” I shake my head, disgusted with the memory of the way he talked about my best friend. “How’d you know?”

She shrugs and looks away. “Just a guess.”

“Right.” My answer is clipped, and I’m more irritated than I probably should be at her assumption. At her correct assumption.

My skin crawls at the thought of that fucking asshat Brock putting his hands on Ivy. The way he talked about her body yesterday makes me sick. Not just because of how he disrespected her, but because I’m also fucking jealous, and I hate it. I try to ignore the way my stomach roils, but I can’t, and all I want to do is drop Cassie off and go for my run.

When I pull up in front of her apartment complex, I’m ready to mumble a goodbye and speed home for my training session, but Cassie reaches over and puts her hand on my forearm.

“You’re tense. You’re angry. I get it. I would be, too.” I’m not quite sure what she thinks she gets, but she sounds sincere, so I meet her eyes and listen. “I really think you should come out with us tomorrow. Before you say no—”

“Okay.”

“Really?” Cassie’s eyes are wide with surprise, and a shocked smile is on her face. “You’ll come out with me?”

“Yeah,” I nod, and her smile makes me smile. My abrupt acquiescence startled her, and me too, to be honest. But I need to stomp out these fucking feelings—feelings for Ivy—that are coursing through me, and a night out sounds pretty fucking good right now.

“Okay! Okay, cool. Tomorrow. I’ll text you.”

“No frat parties, though.”

“That’s fine. We’ll bar hop. It’s gonna be great.” Then she squeals a little and leans over to hug me goodbye, which catches me off guard. “Thanks for the ride, Kell. See you tomorrow!”

I feel both lighter and more weighed down on the drive back to my condo, but I don’t bother trying to dissect it. Instead, I run through tonight’s training session in my head. I’ve got seven weeks until the marathon, and that’s where I am going to focus my energy. Then tomorrow, I am going to go out, have fun, and blow off some steam like a normal fucking college student.

A few hours later, I’m sweaty as hell but I feel refreshed in a way that only a good, challenging run can do. I fucking rocked my training session, and I’m even excited about going out with Cassie and her friends tomorrow. Might even find someone to take home. I’m not ruling anything out at this point. Not Cassie, though. I meant what I said about her being too close, too connected to my day-to-day life. Definitely not ready for that kind of shit yet.

I go to open the door to my condo and find that it’s already unlocked.

“Jesse,” I call, kicking my shoes off on the New Apartment, Who Dis doormat Ivy bought us. “What happened with st—"

“It’s me!” A voice coming from my bedroom cuts me off, and I can’t stop the smile that takes over my face. I tell myself to shut it down, to smother the warmth that bum-rushes my chest and sets my heart racing, but I just fucking can’t.

I’m a goddamned masochist.

Ivy skips into the kitchen, looking like my fantasy in fucking jeans and a t-shirt, and maybe it’s because I’m physically exhausted from my run, or because I’m emotionally wrecked from yesterday’s encounter with Brock the Beefy Buttface, but I let myself look.

“They let us out of lecture early, so I thought I’d bring dinner for my two favorite men.” A smile takes over her face, her dimple popped and adorable, and she slides a large brown paper bag in front of me. As usual, she’s completely oblivious to my inner turmoil.

“Two favorite men? What about Jacob?” I tease and peer into the bag.

“Hush.” She rolls her eyes. “He’s not a man yet, so he doesn’t count. And anyway, he’s my favorite human. That’s different.”

“Of course. So, what did you bring me?”

“China Wok. Your fave. Beef and broccoli and some dumplings,” she says as she sets containers and chopsticks in front of me.

It smells fucking phenomenal, and if I gave in to my impulses, I would totally kiss her right now. But I don’t give into my impulses, ever, and the punch to my gut it creates is exactly why I need to go out with Cassie tomorrow night. So instead, I smile and take the chopsticks from her hand, making sure that our fingers brush just enough to create the zing of barely-there energy that I crave like an addict. Because I am still a fucking man in love with his best friend.

“I got J that fried rice he likes,” she continues unbothered. “Where is he? I thought he had an early bio-chem lab on Thursdays.”

“Yeah, he does. But he’s got a study group tonight,” I answer.

“Dang. Oh well, more for me,” Ivy chirps, and she picks up her food and carries it into the living room.

The condo I share with Jesse is nice. Much nicer than most undergrads can afford. It’s in a private building and the majority of the residents are older, established townies or PhD students. Between my parents and Jesse’s parents, the monthly payment is chump change.