Lover (Betrothed 3)

“You still need to eat.” She took the seat beside me, wearing a long sweater dress with brown boots that went to her knees. Her brown hair was curled and long, and the makeup on her face made her seem too beautiful to be real. Her diamond ring was still on her left hand.

I had worried Maddox had taken it away. “When I’m hungry, I’ll eat.”

She dropped her insistence and looked at the city below her. On the outside, it seemed like nothing had changed, like she hadn’t been the target of a violent crime. But there were subtle cues that I noticed. Her eyes didn’t roam over my chest and shoulders the way they used to. She didn’t grab the front of my shirt and yank me toward her for a kiss. When we were in bed together, she never tried to make it into something more. She didn’t even try to pull me close. There was no hint of arousal in her gaze.

Maybe it was because my body was so scarred. Maybe she didn’t want to hurt me. Or maybe now that I wasn’t as strong as I used to be, she’d lost her lust.

Or maybe it was because of the thing I didn’t want to think about.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss sex.

I didn’t just miss it…I missed it with my wife.

I missed that closeness, that tenderness. It was the closest I could get to her heart, the closest I could get behind her walls and pretend she felt the way I did.

But I wouldn’t dare pressure her. Wouldn’t even mention it.

She’d have to do that on her own. Or at least tell me she was ready.

She turned her gaze back to me. “You look so much better… That makes me really happy.”

“I’ll be better before you know it.” I never confessed how much pain I endured. I didn’t tell a soul how miserable I was. I stayed positive to ease her pain. I was in this condition because I sacrificed myself for her. I didn’t want her to feel worse than she already did. It was easy to focus on the finish line and forget all the roadblocks along the way.

“I know…” She reached her hand for mine on the table, her fingers so little in my palm. She gave me a gentle squeeze, accompanied by her beautiful smile.

I’d give anything to kiss her right now.

To pull her into my lap and dig my hand deep into her hair. I would love to go back to what we were before that evil man ruined our lives. It used to be just the two of us, slowly solidifying our relationship.

Now we had to start all over.

I’d earned my brother’s forgiveness, but that didn’t seem to matter. Now that Sofia had to struggle with this new agony, it made no difference if she could love me. She was too burdened to be able to do so anyway.

After weeks passed, I made it all the way down to the bottom floor and stepped outside. The black car was waiting for us, and I realized it was the first time I’d left the house since I came home from the hospital.

Sofia was with me, insisting she join me for my first round of physical therapy.

After we got into the back seat, the driver drove off.

She was loyal and attentive to me every moment of the day, but there was a distinct distance between us. We both had our own issues, but we refused to confide in each other. As a result, there was a minefield of silence between us.

We used to hold hands in the car, or she would rest her cheek on my shoulder. Now, we sat on opposite sides of the car, hardly saying anything to each other. When she looked out the window with a somber expression on her face, I wondered what she was thinking, if she was reliving the terrible things she never mentioned.

We arrived at the facility, and I walked inside with a straight posture, pretending to be as strong as I used to be. I didn’t want Sofia to view me as weak, to assume I would never get her the revenge she deserved. I felt like I wasn’t worthy of her, and I didn’t want her to think that too.

Not long after we checked in at the front desk, they were ready to see me.

Sofia moved to take a seat, as if she expected to watch me until I was done.

“Sofia?”

She turned back to me, immediately enthused by the possibility of me needing her assistance. “Yes?”

“I need you to wait in the car.”

Her eyes fell. She looked so hurt that it seemed like I’d slapped her across the face.

“I just need some privacy.” I hated to hurt her, but I didn’t want her to watch me struggle to complete ordinary tasks. It was humiliating. It wasn’t a version of myself I wanted her to see.