Room 452

Sawyer runs a hand down his face. “I don’t know.”

I nod and turn away. Sawyer grabs my arm and turns me back around. “No! Fuck no! You don’t get to just run and hide again! I’ve never done anything like this before! I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing!”

I feel tears pricking my eyes. My emotions are running wild. “Exactly! I can’t trust you!”

Sawyer stares back at me madder than before. “Don’t fucking pretend this has anything to do with me! You’re fucking scared Blake! Enough of this bullshit! You talk about me not being able to talk about things. Take a look at yourself! You haven’t once told me what you want!” He shouts.

“What do you want me to say?” I scream. “That I had a shitty mom who messed me up in the head and now I don’t know how to trust people?”

He steps closer to me and pins me back up against the wall. “Tell me something! Anything Blake! Instead of just fucking hiding away like you always do! Tell me what you’re feeling!” He shouts back.

I feel a tear slide down my cheek. “I-...I-...” I try to find my words.

Sawyer leans his forehead up against mine and wipes the tear to the side. “You what, Blake?” His voice rumbles quietly between us.

“I lo-.” I’m cut off by the office door opening

up.

“Hey, sweetie, you got a sec-.” My eyes connect with my dad’s staring back at me. He looks at Sawyer pressed up against me, and his eyes widen. “What’s going on here?”

Out of instinct, I push Sawyer back off of me, and he does not look happy about that. “Dad.” I say as I walk toward him.

“What are you doing with him?” He spits out the words.

“Nothing!” I shout. “It wasn’t anything.”

Sawyer walks toward me. “The fuck it wasn’t!” He shouts.

My dad yells back at him. “You stay away from her!”

Sawyer takes a deep breath. “With all due respect sir, I’m not going to do that unless she asks me to.”

I stare back into his eyes, and my heart beats faster. I feel more tears pooling in my eyes. My dad looks at me concerned. “Can we talk alone?” He says.

He turns and I follow him out of the office, but Sawyer follows behind. My dad whips around and stares at me. “What do you think you’re doing? Being with a man like him? You know that’s not going to end well!”

“It didn’t mean anything!” I cry.

“Bullshit!” Sawyer shouts again.

My dad just pretends he’s not there. “You know guys like that only care about themselves. He doesn’t know how to take care of you. Don’t fool yourself into thinking his feelings for you are real.”

Sawyer remains quiet then, which is so unlike him, so I turn and look at him. That’s when I see it. The fear in his eyes. The fear of not being good enough. The fear that he is unworthy of love. The fear of rejection. My heart breaks fully open to him.

I stare back at him, my head and my heart at war with each other. The longer we stare at each other, the angier Sawyer becomes. His breathing picks up, and he stares so intensely back at me. “Finish what you were going to say Blake.” He grits out.

More tears run down my cheeks. I glance back over to my dad, and he seems to sense that we need a minute, so he slowly walks away. I look back toward Sawyer who hasn’t looked away from me once. “Finish.” He steps forward. “What.” Another step. “You.” Step. “Were.” Step. “Going.” Step. “To.” Step. “Say.”

He stops inches from me. His eyes pool with emotion. So much so that I know everyone is wrong about him, including myself. He doesn’t put on this show and play these games to be an arrogant asshole. He does it to protect himself from getting hurt. The same way I do. He has no idea how a real relationship is supposed to work. How could he? How could I? All I know is that I want him. Every part of him. I don’t want to be scared. I don’t want to hide away. I want to give him everything.

“I love you.” I whisper, laying it all on the line. No going back now.

Sawyer sucks in a breath and stares back at me with wide eyes like he doesn’t believe the words that just came out of my mouth. “What?” He breathes out with a confused smile.

I smirk back at him and then bite my bottom lip. “I said I love you.” I say in a sassy tone.

“I fucking heard you.” He exhales with a smirk of his own. Then I am pulled to his body so hard that everything slams against him. He slams his mouth to mine, and he holds me so close that it feels like I am melting into him.