Force (The Disciples 5)

“What’s going on with you, man?” There’s worry in Blade’s green eyes. He knows I’m off, and to be honest, I don’t care.

“Insomnia,” I respond. What else am I gonna tell him? That I’m fucking concerned I may have a real problem? That I’m obsessed with Julianna—someone I can never have? Especially since I, myself, can’t seem to figure out this strange fixation.

Blade glances at Axel, then they both look at me. Fucking Axel. I have to fight myself from knocking his boots off the table and punching him in his pretty face. I’m not going to though. He’d probably like it.

“Okay. Here’s what’s happening. I’m having Needles and Edge deal with the Russians, starting now,” Blade says, turning to Ox. “And twice a day I want the clubhouse swept. Axel?” He reaches for the pack of cigarettes. “Make sure you alert the girls at the clubs not to be too friendly with any of the Russians until we see how this all plays out.” He lights up and leans back in the chair.

Boris’s face swims in front of me. What the hell was she thinking last night? Had I not been there for her… He’s a fucking predator, a rapist. I should have put a bullet in his head same as I did with the other Russian rapists.

Butterfly.

He called her Butterfly. Yeah, Blade’s smart to remove me from dealing with them. I’d have a trail of graves following me.

Why didn’t she fight? Scream? Do anything? I can’t stop replaying it in my head over and over, the way she simply stood there.

If she really is that naïve, that shit ends today. I stand with so much force my chair falls backward, causing my brothers to stop talking and look at me. I couldn’t care less. The need to go to her trumps everything happening in here.

“The fuck, Ryder?” Axel frowns at me as I walk past him, pushing the large filing cabinet out of my way to get to our safe. Piles of cash, drugs, and expensive alcohol are lined up neatly in here. I push a box of champagne to the side, allowing me to get to our hardware. I need a .40 Glock. It’ll fit her hand better. I grab one, put it in my waistband, take a couple of clips, and slam the safe shut.

A phone rings, making the uneasy silence in the room more pronounced. I smirk, ignoring their stares as I move to the conference table. Blade holds up his hand, stopping any questions as Axel’s eyes narrow on me. He shakes his head as if he’s got it all figured out. I almost laugh. What they’re worried about is all his making…

Axel stands, grabbing the annoying phone, and moves to the corner to take the call.

“Relax.” I look at Blade who looks anything but calm, not that I can really blame him. I reach for the bottle of Jack from Ox, and motion for the pack of smokes off the table.

“Mom.” Axel’s voice cuts through the uncomfortable vibe as Ox tosses the cigarettes to me.

“Yeah, hold on a second—” Axel lowers the phone. “Where the fuck are you going?”

I ignore him and walk out of the conference room. I’m taking matters into my own hands. Gia is his responsibility, but Julianna is mine.

Barely acknowledging anyone, I take the stairs two at a time. We raged hard last night, and Amy’s gonna be pissed when she sees the state of the clubhouse. My brothers are only now starting to rouse themselves. I move straight to Axel’s room, not even fighting this attraction I have with her anymore. Maybe it’s my insomnia. Or maybe I know deep down inside that this woman is different from all the rest.

I pound on Axel’s door at the same time Edge walks out of his. He shoots me a frown, then runs his hands up and down his face and starts down the stairs. He’s been quiet and dark lately, and it has nothing to do with Russians and everything to do with Dolly.

I can’t fix them; I have my own shit to deal with. And I warned Axel to grow a pair and send Gia and Julianna back to Berkeley, but here we are. Edge is miserable, and I’m pounding on Axel’s door. No matter what happens, she will not be a victim. I’m about to pound again when the door opens and Julianna peeks out, her eyes huge. She partially hides herself behind the door. As if that’s okay, like hiding protects her from me or anyone else.

“Jesus Christ.” I stare at her.

“Ryder?” Her voice sounds raspy, as if she just got up. Shooting me a shy smile, she glances down at her bare feet then back up at me. My ears ring slightly, as if I’m in a tunnel. What the fuck?