Shattered (Shattered Souls MC 1)

Harper

I apply my red lipstick and look at myself in the mirror. My hair is in perfect waves, my makeup is flawless. The tight jeans I have on make my legs look amazing, while the black tank top gives my breasts enough exposure without looking slutty. I look good on the outside, but inside I’m a wreck. Family dinner. Fucking hell. I haven’t been to one of these since I was a kid, and that was only because my dad was out of town and Adalyn thought I might be starving. I remember walking into Brooks’ house and I didn’t know any better. To me they were just Zane’s wild, crazy family. I knew they were a club like mine, I just didn’t understand the significance of it all.

My club doesn’t do family dinners, so it intrigued me. Made me jealous in a way. Even at that young age, I craved the connection they had. The only connections I knew were pain, fear, and demands. Seeing the way they all were, it was something I’d say mirrored love.

When I walked in they made me feel at home. There was nothing expected of me, just to enjoy being there. It was strange to me, yet it was comforting.

I lift my eyes to look at myself again. I see the world completely different than I did back then. I’m jaded, I’m broken, I’m untrusting. A family dinner, with the club that has been the enemy, has my stomach in knots. I’m not so sure I will be welcomed in with open arms. A lot will see me as the enemy still and they should. It’s still how I see some of them.

“Hey, you almost ready?” Zane asks, stepping behind me. “You look beautiful.”

My eyes catch his in the mirror and I force a smile. “Thank you. Yeah, I guess I’m ready.”

“Babe, you need to talk to me. I can’t guess what’s going on,” he says, wrapping his protective arms around me. His hands rest on my stomach and he kisses my head.

“I’m just uneasy about a family dinner. I’m still the enemy,” I say, going for honesty.

He spins me around and sinks his hands into my hair. I love that possessive move. It turns me on as much as it makes my heart race. His face is hard, his jaw ticks, and his blue eyes pierce mine. “You were never the enemy,” he growls.

I reach my hand up and cup his cheek, his unshaven face scraping against it. “In your eyes, baby.”

He slams his mouth to mine and I sink into him. I’m not sure if he’s trying to relax me or him at this point. I don’t think I’m the only one unsure about this dinner. He’s stuck in the middle, his club and me. He doesn’t want to let either of us down. It hurts my heart.

We pull apart and he rests his forehead on mine. “I know I put you in this position. You wanted me to let you go and I couldn’t. I understand your mistrust, believe me. However, I wouldn’t have you there if I thought for a second it was for anything other than what it is. Nothing will happen to you. It’s not only in my eyes, babe,” he says, kissing me sweetly on the corner of my mouth. Searching my eyes he blows out a deep breath. “That I can promise you.”

Not willing to make him feel he needs to pick me or his club, I force a smile. “Okay, babe, let’s go.”

When we park in front of Brooks’ house, my stomach drops. There are so many bikes and cars here. I wasn’t expecting there to be so many people. Instinctively, I grab his hand, holding on tight.

He looks down at me and grins. “A lot of this is Brooks’, don’t worry. It’s just family.”

Family. I don’t even know the fucking meaning anymore. I don’t say anything though, I just allow him to lead me inside. The level of noise is the first thing I notice. The deep laughs, the loud voices, the sound of pots and pans hitting together. The next thing I notice is most of the women are in the kitchen and the men are scattered between the living room and dining room. There are a few little ones running around, laughing as they chase each other.

“Z,” I hear from the kitchen and we head that way. “How are you, hon?”

I haven’t seen her in years and I’d know her anywhere. Gloria, Brooks’ wife. She’s every bit the biker wife you’d picture. Her dark hair has bright highlights threaded throughout. Her makeup is heavy, her clothes are tight, and she looks like she could kill you with a look. Don’t get me wrong, she’s a pretty lady, she just has an edge that is very sharp.

“I’m good, Aunt Glor,” he says, giving her a quick hug and kiss.

She turns her eyes to me and I force myself to look like I could give a shit. She assesses me carefully, studying everything from my hair to my heels. She’s a lot like me, smart, sassy, and not afraid to run her mouth.

“Gloria,” Zane hisses.

“Shut up, Z,” she says, snapping her head to him before focusing back on me. A huge smile hits her lips and she grabs me for a hug. “You’ve grown up to be gorgeous.” She holds onto my shoulders and stares at me before shaking her head. It’s as though she convinced herself of something and is happy with what she came up with. “It’s a fucking blast from the past having you here. I truly am glad you came.”

I’m not sure I believe her, but I’ll play nice if she is. “Thank you for having me. You look great.”

“Little Harper Kingsley,” Nora yells, pulling me from Gloria. “Shit, Enzo told me you were back, but I guess I didn’t believe it until right now. How’s everything sweetheart? Your father still the biggest piece of shit bastard on Earth?”

I can’t help the laugh that comes out and I nod. “That’s an understatement, but yeah he is. How are you?”

I’ve always liked Enzo’s wife. She was always nice to me, treated me like I belonged. She told me once that my father doesn’t define me and I shouldn’t let him. I wish I could go back in time and take her advice.

“I’m good, older but wiser,” she laughs.

Adalyn kisses my cheek and smiles. “Hey, sweetie.”

It’s a lot to take in. I’m not sure I trust all the pleasantries. But one thing I’ve learned in the life, don’t give them what they want. I won’t allow anyone to know how I feel. I’m a fucking expert at keeping it all hidden.