Trek

Heidi

Numb. All I feel is numb. The clubhouse has been on lockdown for a week now. There are no signs of Drake, Jake, or Trek. No one has heard anything. No one has reached out. I find myself crying all the time, wondering why this had to happen to him. Why didn’t I just stay there? If I had stayed and never ran, this wouldn’t be happening.

I debated calling his mom, but what would I tell her? That her son, her only son, is missing, and it’s all my fault? I feel horrible. I feel less than nothing. I shouldn’t have been here, and then he wouldn’t be in this position. I’ve debated leaving, but Demon told me I wasn’t going anywhere. Cheryl reassures me it isn’t my fault, and Evie can only hug her little girl and try to keep her head up. I see it wearing on her too. I can feel it. We’re a fucking mess, and the guys have no clue what to do. They’re looking, I know they are, but that doesn’t make me feel any better.

“What the fuck?” I hear Demon growl as he looks at his phone. My insides drop. I walk over, and he pulls the phone closer to him.

“What is it? Did you hear something?”

“The prospects dead,” he snaps as the others gather around. Griz’s hand comes to rest on my shoulder as a sob rips from my chest.

“That doesn’t mean the other two are, Heidi.”

“How do you know he’s dead?”

“They sent a photo.”

“And nothing about Trek or Drake?” He shakes his head. Is that good news? Is that bad news? What the hell does any of this mean? I wring my hands together when Evie walks over and grabs my hand in hers. She pulls me away from the group of guys and off to the side.

“Whatever they're talking about, you don’t want to hear. I promise.”

“I need to know if he’s okay, Evie.”

“Trek is strong. I’m sure he’s going to be fine. I just know you don’t want to be involved. I’ve been there before.”

“I feel so bad. I feel like I caused all of this,” I tell her.

“I know you do, but you didn’t. This, all of this is what the guys do. They will kill anyone involved in trafficking. It runs deeper for Drake. There’s no way this is how his life ends,” she tells me. I can’t believe she’s so optimistic. I can’t say I feel the same. I feel horrible, as low as a person can get.

Cell phones all sound off simultaneously, and I wonder what the hell is happening now. Gasps and curses sound through the room when I run back over to Demon.

“What is it?”

“You don’t wanna see this,” he warns.

“Is it Trek?”

“I said you don’t wanna see this,” he repeats louder this time. My stomach clenches, but I do need to see it. I reach out and grab his phone quickly and run toward the hallway. When I look down at the screen, I see it’s a video. I press play and watch in horror at what unfolds. No. they can’t be doing this to him.

“I told you,” Demon says, taking his phone from my hands as tears roll down my cheeks.

“They’re killing him.”

“They’re killin’ a part of him,” he agrees.

“What do we do?”

“We find them. The video quality isn’t the best, but we can see the background in the clip. It looks like a warehouse.”

“That’s not helpful!”

“It’s the best we got for now,” he says before calling out to the guys and walking toward the office. The girls are left stunned and confused by what’s happening and me? I fall to my knees, begging God not to let this happen to him. What I saw on that video was horrific and will change him forever. I know. I’ve been on the receiving end of it.

“Come on,” Cheryl grabs my arm and helps me to my feet. I feel like a zombie walking into Trek’s room with her. I feel like everything has shifted, and there’s nothing left of me. They ruined him. They’re breaking him, and I can see it in his eyes on that video. He’s no longer the Trek I know. He’s gone. His eyes were so void.

“He’s dying.”

“He isn’t. He’s stronger than that,” Cheryl argues as she sits me on the bed.

“Did you see what they were doing to him?” I scream as more tears pour down my cheeks. My chest clenches, anger and pain running through me.

“If I never showed up here, this wouldn’t be happening.”

“It would be. They would have found out one way or another, Heidi. Listen to me. These men are built for this. They can handle a lot more than us women give them credit for.”

“He’s being raped, Cheryl! Raped! There is no coming back from that. I’ve been there!” I can’t take anymore. I collapse onto the bed in a heap of tears. I don’t know what to do. There has to be something. I feel like a failure for not being able to help more. I feel like my world is slowly spinning, falling apart, and there is no way to stop it. Trek is my world. He became my world. And now that’s being taken away from me.

“I’m scared,” I tell Cheryl. She sits on the edge of the bed, running her hand over my hair.

“I know you are. We all are, but we have to be positive now.”

“How can I be when they’re hurting him?”

“I know it’s hard, Heidi, but you have to believe Trek is strong enough to handle this.”

“He’ll never be the same,” I whisper as tears continue to fall down my cheeks. I know he won’t.

“Then we deal with that as it comes.”

“I need him, Cheryl. I love him.”