Mathiras (Corsair Brothers 4)

Mathiras turns around slowly in my arms, and then tsks at the sight of me. “You’re naked, Helen.”

I shrug, burrowing against his chest. I just want to hold him for a few hours and breathe him in. Six, maybe eight hours tops. “I missed you.”

He cups my skull in his big hands and presses kisses atop my head. “I know.” He kisses me one more time and then slides out of my grip, taking off the fitted tunic he’s wearing over his trou. “Here. Put this on and we’ll save Adi some discomfort.” He tucks the tunic over my shoulders, and when I fit my arms into the oversized sleeves, he activates the auto-fastener. It hangs off me like a cloak, but it smells so delightful that I breathe deeply. He leans in and kisses me again, studying my face. “Better?”

I nod, burrowing into the fabric. “Can I keep this?”

Matty runs a hand over his naked chest, grinning at me. “You know I can’t refuse you.”

Adiron clears his throat. “This is great and all, but there are other people here on the bridge trying to work so they can get back to their mates as soon as possible.”

Mathiras nods at his chair, indicating I should sit down. “We’re scanning the rest of near-space to make sure we haven’t missed any pods that might be floating out there. They’re programmed to head for the nearest habitable environment, but we want to retrieve as many people as possible because we know they’re safe with us.”

I head to Matty’s chair and curl up in it, tucking my legs under the tunic. His scent all around me is calming my racing thoughts, and I feel good. Soft. Relaxed. “How many people have we saved?”

“Between us and the Scarlet Gaze, we’ve retrieved 226 human clones, 73 of various races, and then there’s the tubes aboard the ship in various states of readiness. We have 412 of those.” Adiron’s tone is grim.

I blink in shock. So many people. “Were they all cloned?”

“If you’re asking if we found any un-cloned donors, yes. They had seventeen people in deep storage, and they seem to be healthy, just waiting for their turn, I guess.” Adi glances over at his brother. “They can be integrated back in with the rest of the humans back on Risda but I don’t know what that means for the others.”

“It means that Lord va’Rin is going to have to figure something out for them. We’re bringing them to safety. He’s agreed to take on everything else.” Mathiras shakes his head. “That’s as far as our commitment goes. And now that the Scarlet Gaze is here, the only thing that’s left is to bring these people home and then take down Lady va’Rin.”

I bite my lip, because I didn’t realize the Scarlet Gaze was here here. I think of Ruth, and the way it felt to have her neck snap under my grip, and then I squeeze my eyes tightly shut. That wasn’t her, I tell myself. It wasn’t. It wasn’t.

A hand touches my cheek. I look up to see Mathiras, and he caresses my face. “Speaking of the Gaze, I need to tell you something, love. We’re going over there later so you can see Ruth.

The urge to flee hits me. I shake my head. “Oh, no, I don’t think so. No thank you.”

CHAPTER 100

HELEN

Despite my efforts to avoid seeing Ruth, Matty insists that I’m going to go see her. He firmly escorts me back to our room and when I refuse to get dressed, he wraps me in a blanket and says he’ll take me over to the Gaze like that. He refuses to yield and I’m the one that eventually caves, putting on a bodysuit and boots and trying not to panic.

“Helen,” Mathiras says as we leave our room. He cups my face in his hands and forces me to look at him—something he’s been doing a lot lately. “Breathe, all right? It’s going to be fine.”

I shake my head, panicked. “It’s not fine. I killed her. You don’t understand.”

“It’s fine,” he soothes, his voice low and reassuring. “I wouldn’t do this to you if I didn’t think it was something you needed. Do you trust me?”

I bite back a whimper, because that’s unfair. Of course I trust him. “Yes, but I don’t see why—”

“Do you trust me?” he asks again, his thumbs stroking my cheeks.

That small touch helps me lose some of the panic, just a little. I slump. “Yes.”

“Then trust me when I say you need this, all right?”

I clutch his wrists, holding onto him. “You won’t leave me, will you? You’ll be with me every step of the way?” I need him at my side. If he leaves me, my thoughts are going to spiral out of control and I worry I’m going to turn into the zombie again, crawling through the duct-work and snapping the necks of everyone I love. “Promise you won’t leave.”