Surge

6

I nodded,knowing he meant to meet me at my parking space. It was the last time we’d properly been together. Maybe it didn’t mean anything, but to me, where we’d left off was a perfect place to start again.

“Yo!” Hunter called again, too lazy to walk over to us and prove he had manners.

Drake hitched his thumb in Hunter’s direction. “Gotta run. See you at the spot at seven. I won’t have that drop top, though. Just the Fiesta.”

“Is it still full of gum wrappers?”

“Some things never change.” He smiled, turned on his heels, and strutted away.

That man still had a crazy impact on me. Unlike the sun, Drake was more like the moon. He didn’t burn me into submission. He was a more mysterious force. Just as the moon made us wild when it was full, moved the seas with its power and even regulated women into being fertile at the same time, Drake owned me just by shining.

Drake’s moon power was in full effect today. I wanted to pounce on him, wrap every limb around his manly core and never let go again. I wanted to cry out and tell him I wanted him back and promise I’d never let him go again.

And yet, even after tonight, no matter how well it went, I’d have to let him go. He wasn’t down to stay in LA, and I couldn’t blame him. But if this evening, when we played arcade games and did whatever it was people did at the Pier, if he lifted my chin again and uttered those words…

“I wish you were on more than my case.”

I’d grant that wish in a heartbeat.

I counted down the moments.Every second, minute, and hour between seeing him that afternoon and now passed with the weight of an eternity. I should have been thinking about work but mostly fretted that I was wearing my least sexy work dress.

It was six forty-five, and I stopped in the bathroom to restore my red lips from their faded disposition. I spritzed a joyful daytime perfume all over my body. For some, aromatherapy, for me, expensive perfume. I smoothed my hair with a comb (always slicker ends with a comb than a brush, my mom had taught me) and stared at myself in the mirror.

What I saw gazing back at me was a different woman from the one I’d seen millions of times before. This woman was a warrior. She was prepared to say anything to get what she wanted. She was prepared to look like a fool, a loser, and to risk humiliation to avoid regret. This Maeve had words to say. She had a voice. She had grit.

I smiled at her and welcomed her to my world. “It’s now or never,” I said to the mirror. “Feel the fear. Do it anyway. And never let the ones who didn’t love you keep you from the ones who will.”

I stuffed my makeup bag back in my tote and floated down to the parking lot feeling mostly elated, with only a hint of nerves. He wanted me back as much as I wanted him. We might finally put this behind us.

I threw open the doors, and there he was. He leaned against his car as if positioned by a photographer looking for the perfect sunset lighting to enhance this man’s beauty. And at that, I needed a deep breath. One that brought oxygen to my brain so I didn’t pass out. This was big. Bigger than big. I’d hoped for weeks and weeks for a moment like this. One chance to be near him again, to tell him I wanted him back.

I’d thought at Uyu, me giving that card to Drake, had been a big move. This move eclipsed that. I was about to ask for a second chance after being lucky enough to have been presented with one.

As I rushed out the door, Drake smiled, open-mouthed, straight white teeth, a spotlight for our moment. I wanted to rush up to him, jump into his arms, and kiss him and just get this next part over and done with. But suddenly, I realized that just because he’d been nice and flirty at lunch didn’t mean he wanted to full-on get back together. Maybe he only wanted to be friends.

Still, it was amazing how good even his friendship felt. It reminded me of the comfort he’d given me at Uyu. Drake had a way of soothing your soul, embracing you and your problems such that he made you own them, but find them beautiful at the same time. His friendship, let alone his love, made you feel deeply human and grateful to be alive. I’d be foolish to deny even the friendship from a man like him.

Compared with the emptiness of the past couple months without him, I’d make my pilgrimage back to virginity if it meant we would just say hello to me every day again.

“Hey there, Fairy.”

But he’d have to drop the Fairy nickname if he wanted me to keep my hands off him in this imaginary friendship world.

“You know, I never had a pet name for you, did I?” I hurried over to him, not caring if I looked eager.

He smiled. “I’ve never really had nicknames.”

Damn. He’d corrected me. A nickname was different from a pet name. Don’t get hung up on it, Maeve. “Not true, Drake-o.”

He scratched his head and scrunched one eye. “Yeah, I gave up trying to ditch that one.”

“Not worth the effort. You won’t have to deal with him forever.”

He walked over to the passenger side door and opened it for me. “Reminding me of Hunter can’t get us out of here fast enough.”

Before I got in, he took my tote bag from my shoulder, making me feel like a queen. How such a simple gesture could mean the world was beyond me.