Paying Her Dues

* * *

Janet answersthe door with a big glass of wine and an even bigger resting bitch face.

“Shall I call the cops now or do you want me to go ahead and wait until we start screaming at each other?”

I don’t answer directly because I don’t negotiate with her controlling bullshit. “Let me talk to Ben.”

She purses her lips. “Ben!” she calls out. “Your totally untrustworthy Don Juan of a best friend is here!”

I glare at Janet. “Nice.”

“Nice yourself,” she hisses, and then shuffles off toward the kitchen.

In the living room, I watch Ben fumble desperately with the remote to pause whatever he was watching. Then he barks at Alexa to pause the TV, but he calls her Siri, and his watch answers.

“Goddamn it,” he says, punching buttons on the remote.

I step in and take the remote from him, pausing the history documentary he was watching. “We need to talk,” I say.

He nods at me, not angry but seriously fucking confused. “Let’s go out back and have a beer.”

Over two IPAs, we talk it out. Direct to the point, no bullshit, no anger. And it doesn’t take long before Ben’s feeling about as good about things as Sam was.

“I can’t say I’d be sorry,” he says, glancing over my shoulder to make sure Janet isn’t eavesdropping like some kind of goddamned prison guard. “I’m not sure she could do better than you, Mike.”

Fuck. I don’t know about that, but I’m going to spend my life trying to make her happy. “I don’t know what I’d do without her, man. I can’t think. I can’t eat. Even now, not knowing if she’s here or not? All I want is to see her. Please.”

“She’s…” Ben says, trailing off. But no sooner has he started the sentence than Jess herself comes flip-flopping out onto the patio.

She marches straight up to me. Mad. Furious. With her phone stuck out straight in front of her. “See what you did? See?”

I squint at the words and make sense of them even from a distance. Congratulations. First chair. Violin.

“Fuck,” I say, standing up to take her in my embrace. “I knew it. I knew you could do it.”

She waves her finger in the way she learned from Sam—all sass and sparkle. “Oh no you do not, mister. I want no part of a position that someone bought for me. I paid my dues, Mike. I worked hard. And there is no way I can sit first chair because you greased the wheels to guarantee it would happen.”

Wait a fucking minute. It was one thing that Sam’s mom was skeptical: that’s her nature. But to think of Jess worried that I’d been undermining her?

“What the fuck are you talking about, baby girl?” Ben grumble-gasps. And I swear I see a little glimmer of laughter in Jess’ eye. It’s only once the words have left my mouth that I realize that it was entirely inappropriate to say that in front of her dad. But whatever. Give a fuck. I can’t have her mad at me for something I didn’t do. “Don’t look at me, baby. It’s all you.”

“Are you telling me you had nothing to do with this?”

I take her phone from her and set it down and then take her hands in mine. “Of course not.”

I take her in my arms, holding her close, pressing my lips to the top of her head. “Really?” she says muffled against my shirt. “Really?”

“I swear. On you. On your dad. On Sam. Hell, even on your mom. And your mom hates me. So surely there’s some kind of superstitious jinx shit I’m putting on myself there. But I fucking swear. You earned this. Clean and straight. I didn’t pull a string or say a word.”

Now Janet comes running out on the patio.

“I’ve just seen the news on the Facebook page! First violin, sweetie! You did it!”

I step back to let Jess have a moment with her mom and dad. And for as tense as it feels, I fucking love being here for this. I fucking love being in her world.

Once the hugs and kisses have ended, Janet turns her fury on me again. “You can go, Mike. We have to celebrate, and I don’t want you here, are we clear?”

I reach out and take Jess’ hand in mine. Her little fingers slip right between my big ones, and finally—for the first fucking time since I kissed her in the car earlier—I feel whole.

“I’m not going anywhere. Not without Jess.”

“Let him stay, Janet,” Ben says. “He’s a part of the family. Always was but now more than ever.”

Janet doesn’t like that at all. The prisoners are taking over the jail and she’s not standing for it. She shakes her head. “Nope. No way, Mike. Get out.”

I shake my head again and turn to face Jess. When my eyes meet her, my heart fucking throbs. And deep down in my gut, I feel the primal urge to be inside her as soon as is fucking possible.

“I’m not leaving without her. So I guess I’ll just call some movers to move me in. Unless you’ve got a better idea, baby girl.”