Heart of a Wolf

No wonder the other wolves stayed in their pelts as often as they did. It was intoxicating and a jolt to my senses. I could hear better, see better, and breathe the fresh air without any of it getting stuck in my lungs.

I was running. I was alive.

I was free.

We ran for hours. I must’ve circled the pack gathering a dozen times before finally feeling the tug of exhaustion at the back of my mind. My muscles burned with fatigue, my lungs coursing with fire whenever I breathed in or out. But it had been worth it. Not only to leave my human form behind but to finally do what other people had done their entire lives.

Val wasn’t around to reprimand me when I went too fast.

She wasn’t there to tell me to test the water before taking a drink. She wasn’t around at all, and as I neared the very border of our territory, my human thoughts finally caught up to me.

As much as I loved running as a wolf, I wished I could be with my sister even more. She must’ve been worried sick.

Either that or planning my funeral.

I should’ve called. Back on that first day with the pack, I should’ve called her like I said I would. Then again, a part of me agreed with Ash. It was better if she thought I was dead instead of… this. A wolf. An unrecognizable form.

With a sigh, I ducked under the boughs of pine and fir, taking my first look at the city ever since this all began. Soft lights reached up to meet the velvet sky above. The stars were less visible out here, the air thicker and hard to breathe.

Lost in my own thoughts, I didn’t hear Fallen come up behind me until it was too late. In less than a second, she wrapped her maw around my scruff and pulled me back. Back under the branches, back into the darkness, and back into pack territory.

I could smell the bitterness of her words before they left her lips.

“Have you lost your freaking mind?” Fallen asked, her shoulders bunched over as she struggled for breath. “That way will only bring death. You’re high right now, I get it, but go that way in your wolf pelt and…” Her voice broke. When she spoke again, the anger of her words wasn’t directed at me.

“You know what, go if you want. You’ve only brought pain with you and no matter how much care and affection our Alpha may show toward you, you aren’t her.”

“The Alpha?” I asked, canting my head to one side as I sat beside her.

“When you look at her you see our Alpha, but when she looks at you… forget it.” Fallen shook her head and sat back on her haunches, curling her tail around her paws as she did.

And that’s when it hit. Dani, the one they lost, the one whose heart beat in my chest, wasn’t a sister. She wasn’t just any part of their pack. She was…

“Ash’s mate.” It wasn’t a question, and when Fallen’s body tensed, I knew I had my answer. “What happened?”

“That’s none of your concern,” Fallen said, casting a warning glance in my direction.

Her scent had changed from the bitterness I’d smelled earlier. It was sweet, almost like an oncoming storm, but not nearly as sweet as Ash had smelled back at the gathering. This was something different.

She’s sad, I realized, sensing the buzz of emotion thanks to my wolf.

“The Alpha hasn’t shifted since,” Fallen murmured, filling the silence between us. “She won’t run with us and refuses to be with us outside our evening gatherings. The pain haunts her, it haunts us all, or it did until you came along.” There was an edge to her voice.

“You came and found me, remember?”

“But she sensed you. That’s the only reason you’re alive. If not for her timing—”

“I’d be dead,” I finished for her. “Look, I had no part in any of this. I know you don’t believe me, but I swear that surgery was supposed to be with a human heart. If I’d known someone messed up—”

“You would’ve given a healthy heart back?” Fallen let out a short laugh, then got to her paws before walking away from me.

I stood behind her but didn’t move. As much as I hated to admit it, she was right. Giving back a healthy organ wasn’t

something I or anyone else would’ve ever done. Of course, if I got Dani’s heart, did that mean the rest of her healthy tissue went to humans as well?

As though she could read my mind, Fallen said, “You were the only case, so you must’ve had something to do with it.”

I opened my mouth to say something but thought better of it. No matter what I said, she’d never believe me, so I didn’t even try. Instead, I took one last look at the faraway city and its bright lights before turning back toward our territory. As badly as I wanted to find my sister, my wolf wanted to run even more. So I ran. I ran into the woods, past the stream, past Fallen and everyone else.