Relapse

I take a step back and he opens his mouth as if to say something before shaking his head slightly and turning away. “Alright, team, let’s bring it in.”

Shit.

Maybe if I was paying closer attention to something other than those gorgeous blue eyes, I would have taken note of the whistle around the man’s neck.

Of course he’s the fucking coach.

I move away from the field, taking my spot on the bleachers again. I look in Lilly’s stroller to find her eyes open as she sits peacefully. Sighing, I take her from her stroller and hold her but its more to comfort myself than anything as my heart pounds far too quickly.

I don’t know who the stranger is, but I can’t help but wonder if he thinks I’m unfit to take care of the kids, from my outburst.

I watch closely as he pulls the team into a huddle, but I miss introductions and his actual name as I stress over if he’s going to call me out about yesterday.

Stop, it wasn’t as bad as you keep imagining it was.

Maybe if I was the kids’ actual mother then I wouldn’t be so stressed out. But I’m not, I’m their aunt and I’ve already had to deal with one custody battle that gave me a migraine. If my mother found out…

She’d take me to court quicker than I could say, so now you want to be a mother.

Nervously, I pull at the ends of my ponytail as my fingers twitch.

I reach into my purse and quickly unwrap a sucker, giving Lilly one too as if it’s the reason I got them out anyway.

The sugar doesn’t ease my nerves as much as I wish but it helps some.

I focus on watching Tanner as he warms up with the other kids. They follow the stretches as the coach runs through them, copying him. The coach bends down and touches his toes and my eyes drift to his ass on their own accord. Like the rest of him, it’s nice to look at, round and strong in the sweatpants he sports.

Stop it!

It’s bad enough he’s seen me act like a crazy woman. He doesn’t need to catch me also ogling his ass.

“Aunt Ivy is losing her mind,” I say softly to Lilly, but apparently one of the other parents hears me because she clears her throat loudly. When I turn, I find her glaring at me and I can’t help but to return it.

She looks away.

I shake my head, praying that practice goes by quickly.

The handsome coach doesn’t need to see Ivy’s meltdown, part two, or part eight hundred and sixty-two if we’re counting all the other ones I’ve had in the last decade.

The rest of practice goes down without incident. None of the other parents say anything to me or look at me the wrong way, though they do seem to make a point of not inviting me to join their conversations.

Tanner runs over to me with his backpack flopping on his back and sweat running down his forehead. “Do you mind if I toss the ball around with Aiden for a bit? He says he’s waiting for his mom to get here.” He points to a dark skinned child still on the field watching us. He waves when he sees my eyes on him.

I look down at the time on my phone and it reads 6:32, but I know we have nowhere else to be. If anything, this will help put off my attempt at cooking tonight. “Okay.” The word is barely out of my mouth before Tanner is wrapping his little arms around my neck and saying thank you. He runs off before I can say anything else, the backpack still flopping wildly.

Lilly suddenly jerks and I drop my phone as I clutch at her, making sure she doesn’t hit the ground. My phone makes a loud noise and I cringe.

Don’t say it’s cracked.

There’s no way I’ll be able to trade the iPhone in at the end of the year for my upgrade if it’s cracked.

“Let me get that.” The coach fills my vision as he bends down to pick my phone up. He wipes the now dusty screen off on his sweatpants before looking down at it. “It’s not cracked,” he says as he holds it out to me.

“Thanks,” I take the phone from him and put it back into my purse as Lilly wiggles her way out of my lap. She plops down in the grass not too far from me and starts to pull it up.

“I just wanted to come over and introduce myself, since Tanner is new to the team,” the coach says, as he holds out a big hand to me. “I’m Nathaniel Miller, but you can call me Nathan.”

I eye his hand for a second before placing my hand in it. Tingles spread up my arm and other places I won’t name. I push the feeling down as I look up at those captivating eyes. “Ivy,” I tell him, cautiously before pulling my hand away.