Sweet Taboo

2

Still three years ago…

Tegyn

Bright and early,the phone rang. Since it was a Saturday, I was trying to sleep in. At the moment, it was only 7:30am. It had better be D. The screen showed it was Annie, so I answered. “Morning,” I managed, trying to sound cheerful when really, I wanted to be unconscious.

“Girl Scout cookies are in. Any chance you can pick them up today so I can get four boxes closer to reclaiming my living room?” she asked in her usual brusque Long Island manner. As a transplanted northerner, talking to her felt like home. Since she had been my neighbor for years before Trent and I split up, it was more like a broken home.

“Sure. When will you be around?” I asked, trying to sit up and get coherent fast.

“Eh, most of the day,” she replied. Then as an afterthought she added, “Oh, and there’s a good chance that Trent will be around.”

In the past, that would have bothered me. I’d have had her meeting me at a gas station, or anywhere but there. Now, with D on my mind and working his way into my heart, I felt impervious to Trent’s brand of charm. There was nothing left he could do to keep me. We had tried dating, attempted living together, and still...it didn’t work. We didn’t work.

“I’m not worried. Listen, I’m meeting a friend for lunch in the area, what if I call before I stop by after that?” Stretching, I waited for her response.

“Sounds good. See ya!” That was her idea of goodbye. Moments later, the call had ended and I was left to start my day way earlier than I intended.

It only took me a moment to make the bed and then make my way into the bathroom for a long steamy shower. As I luxuriated in there, I considered how surprised I was to discover that I really enjoyed being single. It was completely unexpected. The alone time that I had never previously experienced, having lived in the dorms and then having married so young, was surprisingly delightful. I could sleep when I wanted. Eat what I felt like. Grocery shop without considering anyone other than myself. It felt so decadent after years of focusing on someone else. Then, after my last break up from a long-term relationship, I started dating Trent. It happened too quickly. I never had that time to find me, to be me.

There was no rushing to get ready for the day. I took time to shave and moisturize, to polish and paint. While I was still sitting in my bathrobe, sipping tea, waiting for my toes to dry, the phone rang. Seeing that it was D brought a smile to my face.

“Babe,” he began, in that gravelly voice of his, “sleep well?”

Chuckling, I responded. “Not bad. Though not long enough.” Then I sighed.

“What’s bothering you?” he asked, sounding concerned.

“Just have to go back to the old neighborhood today. Girl Scout cookies are in.” I was silent then, waiting for him to work his magic.

“Don’t worry. You’ll be fine.” He paused for a moment. “I…I need to see you, to speak with you. Any chance I can come by?”

“When?” I bounded to my feet, hoping I’d once again discover him outside my door.

“I thought I’d go grab us some bagels from Panera. I know what you like. Then I’ll be right over…say ten minutes?” D was saying all the right things, but his voice was flat. I decided to chalk it up to being tired.

“Sure. See you soon! I’ll leave the door unlocked for you. I’ll go get dressed.” I giggled, anticipating his response.

“No. You leave that door locked. I’ll knock and wait for you,” he argued.

“Okay.” I was mildly disappointed, but mostly because I expected him to say something about not getting dressed. I hoped he’d want a quickie since neither of us had time for a longie. Hit with a sense of foreboding that wouldn’t quit, I wandered into my closet to dress.

Less than ten minutes later, there was a knock on my door. I had been sitting on the couch, sipping tea, waiting for it. Grinning, I set my mug on the counter and rushed to the door to greet him. I’d settled on yoga pants, knowing he loved the way they hugged my ass, and topped it with a long tight t-shirt.

“Hey, babe,” D murmured when he entered my apartment. “You good?”

I nodded happily as I watched his eyes skim over my appearance, then I turned on my heels and padded into the kitchen to find us some plates. As I did, I heard him groan.

“Damn, baby.” He sighed.

When I had plates in hand, and saw his face again, I knew I hadn’t been imagining things on the phone. “What’s wrong?” I asked as we sat at the table.

D opened the bag and placed our respective bagels on our plates. He went with the everything bagel, while I enjoyed the cinnamon crunch bagel. He shook his head as he set it before me. “I don’t know how you eat that.”

“Split, toasted, and buttered. Obviously.” I giggled and pulled the sections apart so I could begin enjoying it. “I had no idea how hungry I was until you suggested bagels,” I noted.

“Yeah. I get that,” he mumbled as he ate and worked to avoid my eyes.