Breathe (Sea Breeze 1)

“What are you thinking?”

I shook my head. I wasn’t going to answer.

“You do know why I stopped, don’t you?”

I wanted to seem mature and say “yes,” but I also didn’t want to lie so I reluctantly shook my head “no.”

He sighed and smiled at me. “Now, I know what you’re thinking.” He turned in his seat to face me completely. “Sadie, that was the most incredible kiss I have ever experienced in my life. Never have I gotten completely lost in a kiss before. It made me want things I am not about to try and get. It was perfect. You are perfect. But I don’t have the strength to kiss you for a very long period of time and still keep my hands off of you.”

I let his explanation sink in and nodded. I focused my attention on the screen, and he groaned. Suddenly, his hand slide into my hair, and he turned my face to his. His smile turned to a smoldering gaze right before my eyes, and he once again touched his lips to mine. I opened sooner this time, and he was inside my mouth making my heart race and my hands tremble. I slipped my hands into his hair, and once again allowed myself to touch his tongue. This time when he let out a low growl, he pulled me closer, and I heard a moan I realized came from me. I scooted over as far as my chair would let me and pressed close. I wanted to be even closer. He broke the kiss again, but before I could mourn the loss, he pulled me into his lap. He seized my mouth again and let his hands run down my arms as he kissed me. Jax’s breathing became fast and shallow, and I melted into him. I ran my hands up his chest, and his body shuddered under my touch. He groaned, and his kiss became more frantic. It became difficult to breathe, and my heart hammered wildly in my chest. I pressed up against him, and another growl tore from his chest as he pushed me back. We sat there looking at each other, gasping for air. I didn’t need an explanation this time. Finally, he set me back in my seat and took a deep breath.

“It might be wise if I don’t touch you again today. I’m not strong enough to stop again. At least not for the next twenty-four hours.”

“Okay,” I replied and smiled. I turned back to the big screen. Knowing he enjoyed kissing me as much as I enjoyed kissing him made my heart swell a little more.

At some point, we finally caught up from what we missed in the movie. Jax managed to eat all of his popcorn, a bag of M&M’s, and some nachos and cheese. I only made it half way through the popcorn, and I ate a few of his nachos and cheese, which he fed me. Well, he didn’t have to try very hard. The minute he held one up to my mouth, I took it.

We exited the theatre as easily as we’d entered. Jax slipped his disguise back on. “How about a walk on the beach?”

I liked that idea, especially at this time of day. “Sounds good, but don’t go to the public beach.”

He pointed to his hat and glasses. “I’m in disguise, and no one will look close enough to realize it is me.”

I thought about Amanda and her friends. If they noticed Jax, things would get out of hand, and quickly. “I know people on the public beach. Remember, I live here. I go to school with these kids. If any of them come up to speak to me, then they will notice it’s you.”

Jax didn’t say anything, but a frown set in on his perfect features.

“What did I say?” I asked when he didn’t reply.

He glanced at me as if he didn’t want to answer my question. “I guess I forget you have a life other than my house and me. I like having you all to myself, and I know it is selfish, but the fact you are going to go back to school to live a normal teenage life with parties and football games and dances makes me jealous as hell.”

I let out a shocked laugh. “My life is a lot easier to accept than yours. You leave to go to movie premiers, and you’re on the cover of magazines, and The Entertainment channel follows everything you do. I have to live with you going back to another world. When you’re on stage, you belong to everyone.”

He didn’t respond for what seemed like forever. We pulled into a secluded part of the beach, and he turned off the engine.

“I know being with me is not easy. But I want you to understand no one has me, or has ever had me, except you.”

I swallowed, emotion building inside me. I nodded, not sure my voice would work.

He slipped a curl behind my ear. “I’ve never met anyone who has seen past the star and found the real me inside. But even if you hadn’t found the Jax the world doesn’t know, I would be yours. When you smiled at me that first time, I was a goner. I just got lucky with the rest of you.”

I wanted to lean into him but I didn’t.

“Come on, let’s go for a walk before I start kissing you again and am forced to use superhuman will power to stop myself.”

I laughed, and we climbed out of the Hummer. As we walked toward the water’s edge, Jax took my hand in his.

The night breeze and sounds of the waves were soothing. It was easy to forget reality out here.

“When I came home last night, I wanted to call you right away and realized I couldn’t. It proved really hard to go to sleep without hearing your voice and knowing you were okay,” Jax admitted.

“I’m sorry you couldn’t call me, but it makes me happy to know you missed me too.”

He laughed. “I didn’t just miss you. I obsessed over what you were doing and if you were okay and who you were talking to. I realized I am going to have a really hard time when the summer is over.”

He stopped, and I turned to him.

“I have a charity event I have to be at next week. They are auctioning off some of my things, and I have to be there too. I want you to come with me.”

My heart hammered in my chest. Going with him into his world wasn’t something I ever expected to do. “I don’t know. I have work and Mom.”

“Please, for me. Don’t make me go again without you.”

I turned away from his pleading eyes. They made me want to promise him anything. “Jax, I won’t fit into your world. I don’t have any clothes to wear to something like that, and I have no idea what to say to people or how to act, and the cameras will make me a nervous wreck.”

He stepped up behind me, pulled me up against him, and rested his chin on my head. “You will be dressed by my personal stylist, and you won’t have to speak to anyone but me. Yes, the cameras will be going, but all you have to do is smile. I’ll never leave you alone, except when I have to sing, and then you can stand backstage and wait for me.”

I wanted to make him happy. I wanted to know every part of his life, but it terrified me. “I don’t know,” I whispered.

We stood there for a long time without words.

Finally, he turned me around to face him. “Please, I need my air.”

My resolve crumbled, and I nodded. “Okay, I’ll talk to Mom.”

His earnest face broke into a grin, and he kissed me again. He held back, and it made me want to press closer. He pulled back before I could press him.

“You taste so good,” he whispered. He ran his fingers through my hair and curled a strand around his fingers. “I love your hair,” he said softly and continued playing with it.

My face burned with an incredible heat.

“Too late. I’ve already seen the blush. Stop trying to hide it from me. I think it's adorable.”

* * *

Chapter Ten

Ms. Mary started fussing over me the moment I walked in the door. Jax smiled and enjoyed it immensely as I assured her that Jessica and I were both fine.

“Girl your age havin’ to run her mama to the doctor in the middle of the night ain’t right I tell ya. You’re too young to be sleeping in a waiting room all by yourself.” She turned and pointed her spoon at Jax. “You should have been there. What good are you if you ain’t there when she needs you.”

“Ms. Mary, he didn’t know about it either. I didn’t call anyone. You can’t blame Jax for anything.”

Ms. Mary let out a loud “hmph” and started stirring her pot of cheese grits again. “Well, you should have called him. He would have come. You’re too young to be alone in hospitals. Crazy people out there.”

Jax took my plate to the table, and then crooked his finger for me to come sit down. I sat beside him.

“I didn’t think about calling anyone. I’ve been taking care of my mother for a long time now. It’s no big deal.”

Ms. Mary spun around and pointed her spoon at me. “And that’s not right. Who takes care of you?” She waited for my answer and getting none, she nodded her head. “That’s right, no one does. You don’t know when to ask for help because you never had anyone to ask before. Well, now you do. You got a boy right there who looks like he would drink your bathwater if you ask him, and you got me, and Mr. Greg, and Marcus. Take your pick. Just stop trying to do it all alone.” She let out a deep sigh and turned back to her stove.

Jax squeezed my hand. “She’s right. But I would prefer it if you call me.”

I smiled at him, and he grinned. “And, yes, if you want me to, I will drink your bath water.”

I laughed out loud and shook my head. “You’re crazy.”

He nodded. “About you.”

My heart skipped a beat, and I took a deep breath to calm down. “I’m sorry I didn’t call you. She’s right. I’m not used to asking for help. But it is nice to know I have people around me who care. This is all new to me.”

Jax leaned over and whispered in my ear, “No matter where I am, I will always be there when you need me.”

I shivered from his warm breath against my skin and nodded, but I didn’t meet his gaze. I needed to get my heart out of my eyes first.

Marcus walked in as we were finishing our breakfast. He stared at me when he stepped in the kitchen. “Is your mom all right?”

“Yes, thank you.”

He gave me a forced smile. “Good,” he said and walked past me toward the laundry to get dressed.

I turned to Jax as he finished his juice. “I need to get to work too.”

He frowned, and then stood up and took both our plates to the sink and rinsed them. I went to get my apron, and Ms. Mary shook her head.

“No, Mr. Greg needs you outside more than I need you in here. He’s battling his arthritis today. He won’t admit it, but I can see it on his face. Go help him.”

I nodded and looked back at Jax to say goodbye before I left.

He smiled at me. “I have a song I'm working on, and sitting out at the gazebo today sounds like a perfect place to be creative. I will see you in a few minutes.”

I smiled and stepped outside. Knowing Jax would be outside with me today made the day seem much brighter. I walked over to Mr. Greg kneeling down in the herb garden, mumbling to himself.

“Morning, Mr. Greg. Why don’t you get off those knees and let me do this.”

He frowned at me. “I have a bone to pick with you, young lady. Ain’t no girl your age supposed to be gallivanting across town in the middle of the night. You should have called me.”

My insides grew warm and toasty. I really had made a new family here. “I know, Mr. Greg, and I am sorry. I’m just used to taking care of things on my own, and I didn’t think about the fact I have people who care enough to help me.”

He stood up slowly, and I fought the urge to give him my arm. I knew his pride wouldn’t take my offer very well.

“Just so you understand you’ve got people to help you now. Lord knows the Stone boy would have come running if you’d called him. I ain’t never seen such a lovesick puppy in all my life.”

I blushed. “I wouldn’t call him lovesick.”

Mr. Greg raised an eyebrow. “Is that so,” he said and shook his head. “Well, now, I guess we got work to talk about, now don’t we. Go ahead and weed this here garden, but be careful for the herbs. Once you’re done, go ahead and pull some rosemary and dill weed for Ms. Mary. She needs some for the kitchen. I’m going to go rake the sand and get it smooth around the bridge.”

I nodded, kneeled, and started weeding. Herb garden weeding was never easy because so many herbs resembled weeds. It wasn’t something I could do mindlessly, so I focused on my job.

The sound of a guitar broke my concentration, and I glanced up to see Jax sitting in the gazebo strumming away and watching me. I grinned and waved, and then turned back to my weeds. It proved hard to think about what I needed to be doing when his voice floated across the yard. I stopped several times to listen to his words, but I didn’t dare look at him. His music soon became sporadic, and I turned to see him writing on a piece of paper and working diligently over his guitar. His frown and concentration made it hard not to stare. I knew if he caught me, it might mess up his process. Other times, I caught him watching me, and he would wink, and I, in turn, would blush. However, the heat made my cheeks pink, and thankfully it helped hide it. After I finished weeding the herbs and taking Ms. Mary the rosemary and dill weed, I was given the job of picking up any debris that may have blown in overnight. I’d just finished carrying a handful of twigs over to Mr. Greg’s wheel barrel when Jason came out. He went over to Jax, and I went back to picking up debris. Jax got up and followed Jason inside. I tried not to let my mind wonder about where the brothers were going, and I focused on my job.