All The Best Men

But I guess that’s what love is about. Because when love shows itself, everything gets mixed up. There are no rights or wrongs, there’s only compromise and muddling your way through. So how were we going to figure this out? I only hoped there was a way to resolve things … with the sweet girl in our arms.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Katie

The coffee was bitter on my tongue, the insides of my mouth curdling. I sipped anyways because caffeine was desperately needed at this point. Sleep last night had been practically non-existent. All I did was toss and turn once the billionaires left, restless and unhappy.

Before, I’d drift off immediately, my body sated, muscles relaxed. But last night was a vastly different experience because even with my body trashed, I was hollow inside now, like a jack o’ lantern with its insides carved out.

So what to make of the situation? The billionaires wanted something real, but I just didn’t see how things could work. They lived in New York. I lived here in Knox. Were they going to come down here on the weekends for a series of flings? I loved them, but how was that even close to okay? I’d just be one more whore, the one who happened to live in Knox, Tennessee, breathlessly waiting like all the others.

Because they probably had women in every city, just a phone call away.

Ladies who put on fancy lingerie, drinking champagne.

Amanda in Atlanta.

Tracy in Dallas.

Mindy in Oklahoma City, not to mention women in London and Paris.

And I was just one more.

My mouth went sour, tears rising in my eyes again. Because oh god, the joke was on me. I was nothing but another dumb female, a plaything for the billionaires.

No.

It wasn’t gonna happen.

I wouldn’t let it happen.

Bile rose in my throat as I rushed to the bathroom, hacking and coughing into the toilet.

I couldn’t do it.

I couldn’t let this come true, it was too demeaning.

Other women might be okay with it. In fact, they might even want it. After all, they’d only be “on call” once in a while, whenever Mason, Kane and Tyler happened to drop by. It’d be easy. Get your hair done, get your nails done, put on some seductive lingerie and presto whammo! That was it. The billionaires would bang you for a couple days, and then they’d leave, your sweet spaces sore.

But I didn’t want that.

No way.

Even the thought made me feel lost and empty inside, like there was nothing but dank air in my form.

How can anyone live like that?

How could I live with myself, most importantly?

But this was what Mason, Kane and Tyler wanted. What they were used to. And wiping my eyes again, I took a deep breath. I was gonna tell them no. I had to, for my own self-respect and sense of dignity. No matter how hard it was, I had to say no.

Even if it meant giving up my dreams.

Giving up the idea of the non-profit.

Going back to my meaningless job.

My heart broke once more, splintering into smithereens.

Because love’s not easy. I’d given my all to the alphas, and yet they couldn’t meet my needs in return. So choking back another sorrowful cry, I staggered out of the bathroom, unable to breathe. But I had to move on. I had to, there was no choice. My dreams had been dashed before they even began, and to be honest, they were never real. The hard truth was that nothing had changed, not one bit.

So slowly, I dragged on some clothes, listlessly tying my hair up in a ponytail. Even though my curls are usually springy and voluminous, today they looked limp and lifeless, exactly how I felt.

It was time to go to work at the magazine again, the dead-end job with nothing to offer.

My life was passing away like the sands in an hourglass, totally meaningless.

And yet there was nothing to be done.

Picking up my lunch bag, I dragged myself over to the front door, squinting as a ray of sun squeezed in through the crack.

And then bam! Something hard hit me on the forehead. What the?

It was Tyler’s chest. I’d literally walked into a wall of man, the billionaire as dark, dangerous and ominous before.

“Hey,” came my weak cry. “What are you doing here?”

They were silent for a moment.

“May we?” asked Tyler. “May we come in?”

I stepped aside, nodding wordlessly. Might as well. It didn’t matter if I was late to work. The truth is, I didn’t care anymore, my soul a piece of lead.

The alphas filed in, and suddenly my living room was too small, the air hot. But they were calm and collected, lowering those massive frames onto the sofa.

“We know what you said last night Katie, but there’s more,” began Mason.

Hesitantly, I sat.

“Okay,” came my slow word. “So what did you have in mind?”