I swallow down hard. “You gave him your soul.”
He strokes his hand down his jacket. “Sold. Not given. And yes, amongst other things. And I got a good price for it.”
And that’s the exact moment when I realise that I’ve lost my best friend for good. I wipe the stray tear from my eye. “When?”
“Just before I brought you back – so I could bring you back.”
I rub my temples. “Why would you do that?”
He looks at me sincerely. “For you, Lucyna. I’ll do anything to be with you.”
“Looks like you’ve wasted your time,” James says, sounding surprisingly calm, “because you’re never going to have her.”
Arlo glances in James’ direction, a blasé look on his face. “And who says so – you?”
“Yes.” I can hear from the tone in James’ voice that he’s picking a fight.
Arlo laughs discordantly and raises an eyebrow. “Hmm, this could be interesting.”
“No, James, this isn’t a good idea,” I plead quietly.
“You should listen to her,” Arlo smarts, nodding his head.
James looks down at me. His dark eyes are blazing. “I can’t just do nothing.”
“Yes, you can,” I say. “Go to Sara’s, make sure she’s alright. I’ll stay here and talk this through with Arlo.” Okay, so I have no idea exactly what it is that I’m going to say to Arlo, but I need to get James out of here quickly before Arlo does something to hurt him.
James looks at me, astonished. “I’m not leaving you here alone with him!” Then he makes a show of taking hold of my hand, the hand that’s been nervously pulling at the hem of my t-shirt.
I see Arlo’s eyes harden. The green in them quickly disperses, to be replaced with the bright yellow just like before. He rests his foot back on the floor and straightens himself up.
I have to stop this, now.
“James, please, you can’t win this,” I say.
“I know,” he states angrily, “but there is no way I’m leaving you here with him, so we’re leaving together.” He turns to go, taking me with him.
I make to speak but I’m too late.
The energy in the room ramps up so high I feel like every hair on my body is stood on end. It all happens in a nanosecond. James’ hand pulls from mine and I watch helplessly as his body flies at high speed across the room and smashes straight into the wall. I hear the sickening crack of his bones. He drops to the floor, debris cascading down over him.
“The only person leaving here is you, Arran,” I hear Arlo mutter through my muted screams.
Chapter 24
The Art of Delusion
It’s strange how a second can feel like an hour, and even stranger is how many thoughts can rush through your mind in that one second.
Stupid, irrelevant thoughts.
Like how James has only just got his pot removed, and how that’s his favourite t-shirt he’s wearing. And the picture frame that’s laid on the floor, broken beside him, contains a photo of him and Max, the last one they had taken together before he died. He’ll be devastated if it’s ruined.
He hasn’t moved yet. I know it’s only been about two seconds since he collided with the wall, but he would move if he was okay, wouldn’t he?
Should I panic?
Or maybe I already am, because something is tearing up in and around my veins, and I have this odd constricting pain in my heart, like there’s a hand gripping hold of it.
But it doesn’t seem real. None of this seems real. Maybe disbelief has taken me over and paralysed me, or maybe it isn’t real. Maybe this is just a really, really bad dream.
My eyes wash down, shutting it all out. Everything’s eerily silent, almost as if the world's holding its breath, waiting to see what’s going to happen next.
I open my eyes.
No, it’s real. He’s still laid there on the floor, motionless, blood trickling from his head down onto the wooden floor.
Come on, James, move baby, you can do it.
Four seconds.
No, it’s been too long now.
And in the snap of a finger, I’m running toward him, crying out his name. The words are tearing up in my throat.
Please, be okay. Please, be okay.
Then I stop.
I’m all but a foot away from James and I can’t move. And it’s not because I don’t want to because, believe me, I want to. I’m trying but I’ve lost all control over my body.
“Sit down, Lucyna,” Arlo commands.
And like an obedient animal, I do. I can’t not. He’s controlling my body, governing every move I now make.
I glance across at James. Tears spill from my eyes, running in quick succession down my cheeks.
“Don’t look at him. Look at me.”
My eyes involuntarily move to Arlo. He looks calm, impeccable. Not a golden hair out of place, not a sliver of emotion showing on his face.
“Please don’t do this,” I gulp back the tears, I’m unable to wipe away.
He sits down in the chair opposite me, relaxed, arms spread out across the back of the seat. “I’m sorry, Lucyna, but you always knew how this was going to go. I was never going to allow you be with him. You belong to me.”
And then I’m filled with a rage I didn’t even know existed. I feel like there’s fireworks’ going off in my head, firing about every which way. And all I know is that I hate him. Hate him. HATE HIM.
“I don’t belong to you,” I spit, venom snaking my voice. “You disgust me. I hate you.”
He throws his head back and roars out a laugh. “Well, there is a fine line between love and hate, so I’m half the battle won.” He shrugs.
I stare at him speechless. Does he have no feelings left in him at all? How can this be the Arlo that I’ve spent the better part of an eternity with? No, I can’t accept that he’s totally gone. There has to be some goodness left in there somewhere.
“Have you forgotten who you are – were - your very reason for being?” I implore.
“Have you?” he throws back at me. “If I remember correctly, you didn’t think twice before turning your back on our home for your own selfish reasons . . . and on more than once occasion.”
“That–that was different,” I stammer.
“Was it?” He shakes his head. “I don’t think so. You left home and changed all in the name of love, Lucyna, and that is all I’ve done. We’re not so different, you and I. And that’s why we belong together. I understand you better than you do yourself.”
“I’m nothing like you! I would never do what you’ve done, become what you’ve become.”
“Wouldn’t you? Not even if it meant you could have the one thing you wanted above all else . . . not even if it meant you could save your precious James by doing so?”
I glance over to James. He’s still not moving. Tears fill my eyes. I blink them back.
“No,” I say, but even I can hear the doubt in my voice. “Please, Arlo, just let me get James some help.” I look deep into his calm yellow eyes, pleading for compassion.
He looks past me. “No.”
“James doesn’t deserve this – this isn’t about him, it’s about me and you – he’s done nothing wrong – he desperately needs to see a doc–”
“NO!” he roars, jumping up out of his seat. I flinch. “It’s always him, him, him! What about me?”
“This is all about you!” I fire back. “We’re here because of you!”
I stare at him hard, my chest heaving. I can see his jaw working angrily and his eyes look like they’re on fire.
After a moment he sits himself back down in the chair and begins tapping his fingers on the arm rest. “Tell me about the lifeguard,” he says.
My stomach tightens. “No.”
“Do you want him to live?” He inclines his head toward James.
I sigh, defeated. “What do you want to know?”
“Are you in love with him – the lifeguard?”
I don’t know how to answer this. I know he’s tricking me in some way. There’s a catch in it somewhere. And if I give the wrong answer, I could be putting Fen in danger too.
So I do the only thing I can, evade it. “He was good to me,” I say. “He helped me when I needed help.”
He chuckles. “But that’s not really answering my question, though, is it?”
I take a deep breath. “No, I’m not in love with him.”
He raises his eyebrow. “I’m surprised to hear you say that.”
I know I’m falling into his trap but I can’t but help ask, “Why?”
He shrugs lightly. “Because it sure felt a lot like love when you were kissing him . . . or should I say me.”
I feel sick. And dizzy. I stare at him, dumbstruck. “You’re Fen?” I exclaim, finding my voice.
“Hmm.” He nods. “That’s what you need to realise, Lucyna. I’m always there. Wherever you are, I will always be alongside you. You can never get away from me.” His lips curve up. “And did you really think I’d leave you out there all alone? What do you take me for? The only regret I have is that when we shared our first kiss, I had to be in the body of that dim-witted mortal.”
My stomach turns over and, for a moment, I actually think I’m going to throw up. I feel wounded. And violated. I need to scrub him off me.
“How did you –?”
“Do it?” he interrupts.
“Yes.”
“Easy. I can do anything I want now,” he says proudly. He has this really smug look on his face which, if I wasn’t human and immobile, I would really love to wipe off.
“I just ‘borrowed’ him for a while, well, his body. It was an easy way for me to stay off Isabel’s radar and mask your essence at the same time, by being so close to you, you see. Every day I spent with you I could see your feelings growing for me. I always knew you loved me deep down.”
“I didn’t have feelings for you!” I rage. “I had feelings for Fen!”
“But I was him. And your kissing me told me everything I needed to know.”
I laugh hollowly. “It told you nothing except that I was lonely and I was drawn to his . . . his looks. And if for one second I had known it was you, I would never have touched him.”
He doesn’t flicker. “I beg to differ,” he says calmly. “You have feelings for me. You’re just not ready to admit them to yourself yet. But that’s okay because we’ve got plenty of time for you to come to terms with them. I’ve waited this long. I can wait a bit longer.”
I look at him with utter disgust and contempt. I can’t believe I once thought this thing was my friend. He’s so self-serving, so callous.
“I think you just manipulated the situation to your advantage, Arlo. I think you manipulated me into having feelings for Fen.”
He actually looks like I’ve hit him really hard. “I didn’t manipulate you. It’s the one situation where I actually didn’t have to do anything. Everything you did, Lucyna, you did of your own free will.”