Ditra kneels in front of me and forces me to look at her. “I know you’re freaking out and you’re scared, but you have to pull yourself together.” I shudder and try to focus on her face. Tears are in her brown eyes, ruining her perfect eyeliner. “We need to get you on a plane, Piper.”
“He has to be okay. I can’t lose him, Dee. I can’t… I love him so much.”
She pulls me up, helping me stand. “I know you do; and he knows that, too. You have to be strong. I want you to go pack and I’m going to call your mom and Josh. We’ll take care of Lyric and the pets. After I call them I’m going to get you a plane ticket and I’m taking you to the airport.”
Everything becomes a whirlwind. I’m on autopilot, going through the motions that Ditra has set in place. Within hours I’m sitting on an airplane on my way to California and I can’t even remember saying goodbye to Lyric. The only things I can are the awful things Reece said.
Fell off a roof.
It’s really bad.
You should be here.
I’m suffocating in this plane with no way to escape the agony in my heart. I want to climb out the window, fall through the clouds, and find a hole in time so I can go back and undo this nightmare.
The confusion and uncertainty has every nerve in my body strung out. I can’t sit still or relax my mind even for a moment. I fight the urge to get up and pace the aisle of the plane like a ranting lunatic.
Why didn’t I call him last night when I didn’t hear from him? Why did I go to bed assuming he was tired and had just gone to sleep? What if something was wrong and he needed me and I just went to bed—abandoning him?
What could he possibly have been doing on a roof? And what roof? Koler’s house? Someplace else? And when—in the middle of the night? No matter how many times I turn it over and over in my head it makes no sense to me. Was my sweet Blue stargazing? Listening to the rain? Praying for our lost baby?
I need to see him. I need to hear his voice. I need to see his beautiful smile. I need to see him alive and breathing. I need someone to tell me he’s going to be okay so this heavy weight in my chest will let me breathe and think. No matter what’s wrong—no matter what’s happened—I’ll be there for him in every way. Without any doubt. I’ll take care of him forever if that’s what he needs. I can be nurse, wife, best friend, and lover. I can be everything he needs.
Anything. Anywhere. Anytime.
That’s what love is.
I lift my hand and press my lips to my engagement ring, just like he does. I can see his intense blue eyes and hear his gravelly voice.
Love you, Ladybug.
I love you, Blue. Please hold on.
Chapter Fifty-Three
I park my rental car practically sideways in visitor parking at the hospital but I don’t care. All I care about is getting to Blue as fast as I can. I run inside, spin myself dizzy in the revolving doors, and stand breathlessly in the lobby, scanning the myriad of signs.
“Piper.”
Reece comes toward me from a hallway to the right and I run to him.
“Where is he? Is he okay?”
Reece puts his arms around me and hugs me in that scary, desperate, apologetic way that screams all things awful. I’m already sobbing as I cling to his wide shoulders.
Closing my eyes, I take deep breaths against his chest, accepting the small comfort his embrace offers.
When I pull away I’m shocked at how terrible he looks. I’ve never seen Reece look even remotely tired but today he’s got angry dark circles under his eyes, his dark skin is ghostly pale, and his black hair is a tangled mess.
“Can I see him?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “Not now. He’s in surgery and—”
My heart lurches. “Is he going to be all right? What the hell happened, Reece? Please tell me something!” Anxiety and desperation are swirling like a cyclone inside me and I’m afraid I’m going to lose control and start screaming for answers.
“Piper, I know you’re upset and this is fucking crazy scary for you and I’m still trying to wrap my head around it myself. I promised Blue a long time ago I’d always be here for you if something happened….”
I wrench my arms from his grip. I don’t want him here for me. I only want Blue.
“Just tell me what’s going on,” I sob. “Before I lose my mind. How bad is it? How did he fall off a roof? Was he drunk? Just tell me. I won’t even be mad. We’ll help him…”