For Their Child's Sake
She didn’t return his hug; her arms dangled limp at her sides. But she rested her forehead on his chest. That small act proved she still cared for him. Maybe that was even worse than having her hate him. If they cared for each other, but couldn’t find a way to be together, wasn’t that the worst punishment of all?
“Group hug.”
Sam glanced to the doorway as Marley smiled and came at them with her little arms open wide. He turned his attention back to Tara. She sniffed as she glanced up and met his eyes when Marley wrapped her arms around them...or tried to, anyway.
“I thought you were sleeping,” Sam said, not taking his eyes off his wife.
When Tara remained still, Sam slid his hands down her arms and eased them onto her waist.
“Group hug,” he murmured.
“I don’t want to rest. I can’t stop thinking about Daisy and my heart hurts.” Marley eased back, then frowned. “Why is Mom crying?”
They were quite the trio of depressing emotions at the moment. Was it even possible they could all heal each other? Sam sure as hell hoped so because he didn’t want to see his girls this upset over anything ever again.
“I’m so glad you’re home and safe. I’m so sorry about Daisy. She loved you very much.” Tara pulled away from Sam and bent to face Marley. “What do you say we paint? I bought new canvases the other day.”
“Paint?” Marley seemed surprised by the request, but then her face lit up. “I love to paint.”
And she was damn good at it, too, even for her age. They’d given her art lessons and she was simply a creative spirit. Sam hoped she hadn’t lost the natural talent. She still had her love of cooking, so perhaps the art would be there, as well.
“Why don’t you two paint? I need to step out for a bit.”
Tara’s eyes instantly came to his. That invisible barrier of protection immediately slid up between them. The way she looked at him, he knew exactly what she was thinking, and, damn it all, he wished she didn’t immediately go to the past.
Yes, when he’d been vague about his outings in the past, he had been going to get a fix, but how long was he going to have to be reminded of that? Did her mistrust have an expiration date?
As much as he wanted to defend himself, he was tired of using words to justify his actions. From here on out, she’d have to learn to trust him or he had no hope of Tara ever moving on and fully understanding just how far he’d come. And he realized they’d never find what they once had, but he sure as hell hoped that, for the sake of Marley, they could be friends without all of the side-eye glances and questioning gazes.
“I’ll paint something extra special for you, Daddy.”
Sam bent and kissed the top of Marley’s head. “I can’t wait to see it.”
Without another word, Sam turned and grabbed his keys off the counter before heading out the door. Right now he needed to concentrate on Marley, not his jumbled feelings for Tara and not the awkwardness that had settled heavy between them.
And he sure as hell couldn’t focus on the fact they’d be spending countless nights together—in the same bed they’d shared as a happily married couple.
Chapter Five
The paintings were done and dried, lunch was over, Marley had napped and Sam still hadn’t returned. Tara couldn’t stop the thoughts swirling through her mind. How could she not revert to when he’d lived here and would disappear for hours, and sometimes days, at a time?
For all she’d seen over the past several months, he was doing his best, holding down a steady job and really putting forth an effort to be a better man. But was all of this with Marley too much for him? Did he need to find something to give him a break from reality?
Tara wanted him to remain clean, to keep rolling into another day of sobriety. She only prayed this didn’t set him back. Unfortunately, when tragedy struck in an addict’s life, they would occasionally slide back into using their old crutch to dull the pain. But Sam was a strong man. She truly did have faith in him and his willpower. He wanted to remain the sober man he’d worked so hard to become.
Marley sat on the sofa with her drawing pad, likely doodling another ocean or mermaid picture. Tara watched her daughter from the hallway and vowed to get her family through this without any hurt. Even though she and Sam weren’t together, she would still keep her eye on him to make sure he wasn’t bringing anything into the house and to make sure he stayed on the path he’d worked so hard to find.