For Their Child's Sake
Sam crossed the hall and made a bed on his daughter’s floor. And he didn’t sleep one bit.
Chapter Six
“I kissed him.”
Silence surrounded her and Tara glanced up from the table of brochures to see her very best friends, Lucy and Kate, staring at her, mouths open and eyes wide.
Yeah, maybe she should’ve led in with a softer opening. She was still processing everything herself, so she hadn’t had time to construct an eloquent sentence.
“He’s only been in your home one day,” Kate stated, as if Tara needed the reminder.
They were setting up for their monthly grief meeting at the community center. The three had come together through their own hardships and discovered there was a need in this small community of Stonerock for those who had lost loved ones. They didn’t focus on the loss, but rather met once a month to form an upbeat, positive atmosphere for those who were hurting.
At least this way, people could bond with others and form deeper friendships over similar hurts. The meetings over the past years had been successful and really opened an avenue of friendships for people who otherwise wouldn’t have opened up and let new relationships form.
Like Lucy and Noah. They’d both lost a spouse in tragic circumstances but had come together and now had a beautiful family.
“Did you sleep with him?” Lucy asked, abruptly jerking Tara from her thoughts.
Tara shook her head and flattened her palms on the table. “No. But how on earth are we going to keep up this charade in front of Marley? He ended up sleeping in her room last night. He couldn’t get out of our bedroom fast enough after we kissed.”
“Why are you upset?” Kate dropped into a metal chair at the end of the table. “You wanted this divorce and now you kiss him? You’re sending mixed signals. He probably hightailed it out of there before he did something you both regret.”
He’d said as much on his way out the door. Still, part of her wished he’d stayed so they could’ve talked. The other part of her, the part that was filled with fear and worry, knew he’d made the right decision.
“The kiss wasn’t supposed to happen,” she defended herself. “But he didn’t have a shirt on and there was a new tattoo I couldn’t stop staring at. I had on my nightgown, and he stepped close, smelling so, so...”
She had no valid reason to want his mouth on hers, to dive back into that emotional pull, other than the fact she’d wanted him to kiss her and she hadn’t pushed him away. It was simple, yet complicated, but she was human with emotions all over the place.
“It’s okay to want to get back together,” Kate said, softly. “You are human and it’s not like you can just shut off your feelings.”
Tara focused her attention on her friends. “I never said that. Getting back together with Sam would be a mistake.”
“Playing house and not falling in love with him will be difficult,” Lucy pointed out, as if falling in love with Sam was the next logical step. They couldn’t even be alone in the same room at this point. So love sure as hell wasn’t an option.
Tara glanced at the clock on the wall. The group would start arriving and she certainly didn’t want to get into this here and now. She should’ve never brought up the kiss, but she’d needed to talk and Lucy and Kate were her very best friends. She trusted them with everything.
Well, except to tell them her divorce wasn’t final. She didn’t want anyone to know Sam hadn’t signed the papers yet. She’d wanted to be a strong woman, wanted to move on with the next chapter in her life. It had been an entire year and she still had an anchor on her, weighing her down. She had to somehow set herself free before she found herself drowning in a situation she couldn’t get out of.
Not only had Sam not signed the papers, he was also living with her again and playing the doting husband and father. He made memories rush back nearly every moment. She’d barely exorcized him from each room over the past year. She’d removed pictures that hurt to look at, she’d left his side of the closet bare and the door closed. But now he flooded every part of her life again. She had her reasons for being so harsh, for being, some would say, cold.