Southern Comfort (Southern 2)

Casey gets off the bed and turns off the light. He puts his arm around me as we walk toward our bedroom. I grab his hand that is on my shoulder, and I kiss it. His wedding band shines in the dim light. It took him three weeks to wear me down and agree to a shotgun wedding. If I’m honest, I would have married him the same day he asked me. “If you want, I can take the next feeding.”

“No,” I say softly. “It’s fine.” I didn’t know what type of mom I was going to be. I mean, I had an idea of what type of mother I wanted to be, but I didn’t know I would be that type of mom. The mom who didn’t let her kids do anything unless I was there. The mom who spent all her waking time with them, the mom who would make five different dinners just so they would eat. I’m the pushover mom, the mom who says no, but really, it’s a yes.

“You’re tired, and if you don’t get the rest you need,” he says, “you are going to get sick.”

“I know,” I say. I pushed myself after we came home with Harlow, and within four days, I was in the hospital after fainting. “Fine, you can feed her,” I say. “There is a bottle in the fridge.”

He gets into the bed, and when I slide in with him, he quickly finds me and pulls me to him. “I love you, darlin’,” he says softly, and I kiss him. The kissing quickly takes on a life of its own, making us itch for more, but we still have another four weeks to go. “Fuck,” he whispers, and I know that it’s killing him. “I thought six weeks would have been easier the third time around.”

I laugh into his neck, and I close my eyes. It takes maybe three minutes before I fall asleep.

I wake up when my breasts start to hurt, and when I look over, I see that the spot next to me is empty. I turn and look at the clock, and it shows that it’s a little bit after midnight. I’ve been sleeping for four glorious hours. I’m about to get up and find Casey when I hear him in the monitor and look over to see the image of him rocking Harlow on the screen.

“I know you don’t like the bottle, Princess H.” He talks to her. “But Momma needs her rest.”

The sounds of her little cry fill the room now. “I have the goods right here. All you have to do is take it. That’s it, my girl.” I wipe the tear that is now rolling down the side of my face. I didn’t know that someone could be this happy. I didn’t know that I could love someone so deeply that I can’t exist without them. I didn’t know that my biggest nightmare would be my fairy-tale ending.

I watch the two of them the whole time, my eyes never leaving them, and when he puts our daughter on his chest, I can’t stop the tears from coming. I can’t stop these overwhelming feelings, and when he comes into the room five minutes later and takes me in his arms, the only thing I can do is whisper, “Thank you for giving me my home.”

He kisses my lips. “Thank you for filling my home.”