Avoiding Intimacy (Avoiding 2.5)

“I do,” she murmured.

“This is my brother we’re talking about.”

“Don’t you think I know that?” she asked, flabbergasted by his refusal to believe her. She thought he deserved the truth, and he wouldn’t even listen to it.

“No, you’re not thinking, and you clearly don’t know anything. Nothing,” he said, enunciating the word very clearly.

“John is my brother. He would never do that. In fact, I can’t even believe I have to justify his behavior. I know him. I’ve known him my entire life, and he would never in a million years do this. Not to me.”

“So, what? I’m a liar?” she asked, her anger rising quickly. “I’m just your lying girlfriend?”

“I take a lot of shit from you, Chyna.

You get away with a lot of shit, alright?”

he said, a bite cutting through his voice that she had never heard. “But, I would be the liar if I didn’t say that you’re making this a bigger deal than it really is. You blow everything out of proportion. I don’t get it, but I’ve endured it because I care about you. You can’t bring this shit up when you’re drunk this late and expect me to take you seriously.”

“I’m not drunk!” she cried back, infuriated. She was tipsy. She’d had a few drinks, but that was it. She hadn’t done anything wrong, and Adam wouldn’t even believe her.

“Please, Chyna, I know when you’re drunk. Stop being a drama queen.”

“A drama queen?!” she all but shouted at him. “Are you f**king serious? I come to you with this, and you call me a drama queen?”

“Yes! God, how do you think people see you?” he asked, slamming his fist in the foyer wall. “You’re a big f**king drama queen! All John had to do was look at you for you to think he wanted to get with you, Chyna. That’s how you treat everyone else.”

“I don’t know if you haven’t noticed, but your girlfriend is wanted by every f**king guy who looks at her!”

“See!” he said, clenching his fists at his sides, restraining himself. “Drama queen! You take the cake! This is my brother!”

“Then, why do you think I brought it up?” she yelled back. “You think I wanted to hurt you with this?”

“I don’t know what you wanted,” he yelled, barely holding it together. “You probably just misinterpreted whatever happened. You drank enough to blackout tonight. Do you even remember the night?”

“I can’t believe this shit!” she cried.

She was shaking from her anger. “I am not drunk! I know my limits. I try to tell you the truth. I try to be honest, and you throw it all back in my face!”

“Well, imagine how I feel!” he cried.

“I do everything for you, and you know I worship John. Yet, you still tell me that he —what? He tried to take advantage of you? Are you f**king kidding?”

“Fucking ridiculous! You can’t even trust your own girlfriend to tell you the truth.”

“From how it sounds, I shouldn’t trust you farther than I can throw you!” he yelled back at her angrily.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” she demanded, crossing her arms over her chest.

“You know what? Fuck it! Just f**k it!” he said, throwing up his hands. He ran a hand back through his hair in frustration.

“Find someone else to deal with all the drama, Chyna! I’m done! This shit is out of control. You had to bring him into this.”

He pointed his finger at her like he was going to say something else, but then he just shook his head and walked out of the door.

He walked out and left her. He left her all alone. Who does that?

Chyna grabbed her cell phone out of her bag. She was furious. Who the hell did he think he was? He couldn’t just walk out on her. She chewed on her lips, her hands shaking, as she searched for Alexa’s number. She wanted him to come back.

She wanted him to fix this.

She had been the one to mess things up, but John had been the instigator. She hadn’t even really done anything wrong.

She just had bad thoughts, but who didn’t have those?

By the time she found Lexi’s number, her heart was racing, her palms were sweaty, and tears were streaming from her eyes. How could he handle all this so callously? Why wouldn’t he believe her?

She clicked Call on the phone and placed it to her ear, slumping down into her leather sofa.

“Hello?” Lexi answered.

“Lexi...” Chyna cried. She never called her Lexi, but she just wasn’t thinking clearly tonight. Hysterics were taking over, and she couldn’t calm herself down. She needed her best friend.

“Chyna, are you okay?” Lexi asked.

“No, oh my God, no, I’m not,” Chyna told her, not able to stop the tears.

“What happened? Chyna, calm down.

It’ll be okay. Just tell me what happened,”

Lexi said reassuringly.

“I don’t know. I just...I don’t know where to begin,” Chyna said, wondering how she had gotten to this point. Had she really been all that wrong? She had told Adam everything.

“Just start wherever, C. Tell me from the beginning. Are you safe? Are you hurt?

Did someone hurt you? Do I need to call someone to come get you?” Lexi asked, nearing hysterics herself.

“No, no, I’m not hurt...not physically.

It’s just...Adam. Alexa, it’s Adam,” she whispered into the phone. It was physically painful for her to utter the words.

“Adam?” Lexi asked anxiously. “Is he alright? Did something happen?”

Chyna chewed her bottom lip and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, begging the tears to stop. She needed to tell Alexa. She needed her to know, and she needed her to understand what had happened. She couldn’t keep it all bottled up, and Adam hadn’t believed her. Alexa needed to believe her.

“Chyna, what happened?”

Lexi demanded.

As much as she wanted to tell Lexi, her stomach twisted at the thought, and her heart hammered in her chest wildly. “Oh, God, Alexa. I can’t talk about it. It’s awful. We got into a horrible argument, absolutely horrible argument. My chest hurts unlike anything I’ve ever imagined,”

Chyna whispered, her voice pained. “He was so calm at first, and then the floodgates opened. We both just screamed at each other. I don’t know what I’m doing!”