It’s a photo of the decorated tree, deep in the woods, with Poppy posing next to it with a Santa hat on, a happy doggy grin on his face. Tears of happiness spring to my eyes. Only Tyler could have left this card here for me. But why? And more importantly, how? Did he actually climb up the house in the middle of the night? And how did he know I was here and which room was mine?
How bizarre.
How stalkery.
How romantic.
A new shiver courses through me, this one warm and tingly and unlike any sensation I’ve ever felt. After what I went through, things like this should scare me. Someone watching me should be a huge red flag. I’m intelligent enough, and I’ve watched enough TV, to know that. And if it was anyone else, I would be terrified. But it’s Tyler, and he’s an exception. He’s special, and he doesn’t scare me. I hold the photo and the card over my heart for a moment before putting them in my nightstand for safekeeping.
Christmas morning is a whirlwind of exchanging gifts, listening to holiday music, and eating an unimaginable amount of food. Zac and Anna join us, which seems to be the norm from what I can tell. My parents cook pancakes, waffles, eggs, and bacon together and appear happier than I’ve ever seen them as they tease each other in the kitchen. After breakfast, they surprise me by singing “Happy Birthday” and piling more presents in front of me. Being the center of attention is awkward for me, and poor Lizzie can’t understand why I’m getting extra presents and she isn’t.
I rise from my seat on the couch and put my arm around her, which she always loves. “I’m going to put some clothes on and go walk in the snow. Do you want to come with me?” I ask her, hoping it will cheer her up.
Her face lights up. “Yes! Maybe we can make snow angels!”
“Awesome. Go get dressed, okay? You can’t go outside in your jammies.”
“Lizzie,” Mom interrupts from the kitchen. “Maybe you can go outside later. Daddy is going to get Grandma soon. Go put your nice new dress on.”
My little sister pouts and stomps her foot. “But I want to go out in the snow with Holly. We’re going to make angels like Holly used to be.”
I open my mouth to respond, but Mom gives us both a warning look before shoving a casserole dish into the oven and turning back to us. “Lizzie, it’s Christmas. Don’t be difficult.”
The happiness I felt a moment ago is replaced by growing anger as I watch my sister stomp off to her room. My mother refuses to look at me as I stare at her.
“I’d love to take a walk,” Anna offers, sensing the tension. “If you don’t mind me going with you?”
“Not at all.” I force a smile onto my face, resuming the mask. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
I take my presents upstairs and change into jeans, a sweater, and boots. As I’m leaving my room, the sound of my mother in her bedroom across the hall catches my attention. Mustering up courage, I nervously run my fingers through my hair and cross the hall to knock on her bedroom door.
“Come in.”
A look of surprise crosses her face when I enter the room and close the door behind me. I watch her as she lays outfits out on her bed for evaluation. “Holly…do you like the presents we got you? You’re so hard to buy for. We can exchange anything you don’t like.”
“I loved everything. Thank you.” I now have more clothes than I ever thought possible. Zac and Anna gave me two new books, a candle, and a coffee mug that changes color with temperature, which I thought was fascinating. I’ve never seen anything like it and can’t wait to use it.
“Mom…” I say hesitantly. “Did I do something wrong?”
She looks up from the four outfits on her bedspread with a distracted frown. “What? Why on earth would you ask that?”
I lean against her dresser and clasp my hands in front of me. “It’s just…every time I try to spend time with Lizzie, you jump in and stop it. It’s been going on for months. It confuses her. And to be honest, it’s confusing for me, too. She’s my sister. I’m trying to get to know her.”
Her lips close into a thin line, and silent admission is all over her face.
“Why?” I urge. “I’m not contagious.”
“Holly, don’t be ridiculous. Lizzie is just a little girl…and she doesn’t really know you. She’s very vulnerable and innocent.” Her chin lifts slightly. “I don’t want her to know any details about your past. I’ve tried very hard to protect her from all of it. She’d be petrified if she knew the truth.”