Promise Me This (Between Breaths 4)

He stalked toward me, reaching me in half a second flat.

A groan tore from his throat as he grabbed my face and crashed his lips against mine. Hard and bruising, my head practically molded into the pillow. This kiss was so different from the one in the bar. This kiss was like a brand.

My fingers flew up and clenched onto his hair. I tightened my grip, which only made him press harder. When I moaned against his mouth, he forced my lips apart with his tongue and then plunged it fully inside my mouth. He tasted like beer and cinnamon gum mixed together.

His tongue smooth like velvet, it explored every corner of my mouth as if on a mission. His fingers grasped onto my neck and then tunneled deep into my hair, effectively holding me hostage.

And then suddenly, the weight was lifted and I could no longer feel him. When I opened my eyes he was he standing at the side of the bed, breathing heavily.

“I’m sorry,” he said in a tortured voice. “I shouldn’t have done that. It’s just—goddamn, you’re so fucking sexy. Your hair, your lips, your body.”

My entire body was thrumming with desire. If he walked away now, I wouldn’t be able to sleep all night long. Let along all week.

“It’s okay, Nate.” I grabbed for his hand, which was shaking. “I obviously want you, too.”

“I don’t want to mess this up,” he mumbled. “I don’t want you to hate me, after.”

“I’m a big girl,” I said. “I can handle myself.”

“But you . . . you’re the only girl who . . .” he stormed away from the bed, his hands tearing through his hair. “Fuck.”

“Who what?” I said, throwing my hands up in frustration. “Who looks like this? Who isn’t your type? Well you aren’t my type either, so what.”

He shook his head violently. “That’s not what I—”

“Who cares about that other stuff? Don’t think so hard,” I practically growled. “Goddammit Nate, I can’t deny how amazingly turned on I am right now.”

“You don’t know me,” he said, in anguish. “How I . . . what I . . .”

“How what?” I said, exasperated by how hard he was thinking about this. I was pretty damn sure he didn’t expend this kind of energy with all of those other girls. “What, Nate? What you want to do to me?”

His eyes flashed with undulating lust.

“Then show me, Nate,” I said, softening my voice. “Show me.”

The plain desire on his face contradicted the shaking of his head.

“I appreciate your nobility and all,” I said. “But I want to feel your body and your lips on me again.”

When he didn’t say anything, I took a deep breath, feeling defeated and more than frustrated. “If you don’t want me . . . that’s okay, too.”

I scooted down the bed and laid my body flat. I wasn’t going to argue with him about this anymore, it was too much work. There was something raw inside of him that he was terrified of unleashing. Still, I didn’t understand why he was fighting it so hard. It was only sex, after all.

He tilted his head back and then let out a strangled growl. Before I could decipher exactly what was happening, he was on top of me again.

His entire body was aligned with mine from chest to knees. He pressed me hard into the mattress as his lips melded with mine. I swung my legs up to wrap around his waist and our centers collided. I could feel the length and girth of him now and holy fuck, he was large.

His fingers gripped my hair firmly, shocking the shit out of me, and it was then that I realized that Nate must like it rough. I’d been with my share of tough guys but now I knew that I would have enjoyed them more if they also had Nate’s softer side to strike a balance.

My hands scaled over his solid biceps to his back. He was hard and smooth everywhere I touched. His tongue was tangling with mine and his hips were grinding relentlessly. If he continued his onslaught against my center, I probably wouldn’t last much longer.

“Goddamn it, Jessie.” He bit and licked my jaw and then sucked on my neck. His lips were hot and hard and like a suction cup against my skin.

With my skin practically burning from his touch, he suddenly slowed way down and lifted himself up on his forearms. I figured he’d freak again and bail, but then he sat back on his knees and looked down at me with tenderness in his eyes.

His tentative fingers reached out and began moving delicately, outlining the edges of the tattoos on my chest and then travelling down to my stomach. It was such a gentle gesture that I shivered. No guy had ever taken the time to do that. Maybe because they were used to seeing girls with tattoos.

He tugged me to a sitting position as he continued to stroke my skin with his silky touch. He kissed my shoulders and then his lips trailed up to my ear. “I like the way you smell.”

I never wore any perfume so I didn’t really know what he meant; still it was nice to hear.

He gathered my face in his hands and stared into my eyes as if admiring me. Then he slanted his head and brushed his lips across mine. I could barely take it anymore. This wasn’t what I wanted—not this gentleness, and not from Nate—it was bound to ruin me for other guys.

I just wanted hot and hard sex, over and done with.

As he softly kissed my throat, I wondered if he thought this was what was expected of him. That maybe all the other Barbie dolls he’d been with needed to be treated with kid gloves.

He nibbled and then sucked on my bottom lip. “Damn . . . I’ve always wondered what your lips tasted like.”