His Ultimate Prize

‘Rafael, you’re freezing. And you’re shaking!’

His laugh was hollow. ‘Sí. In case you haven’t guessed yet, querida, I’m a hot mess right now.’

‘Oh God!’ She threw her arms around him, her warm hands pressing into his skin.

Another series of shudders raked through him, setting his teeth chattering. Her fingers speared through his hair, pulling him down into the crook of her neck. He wanted to move, needed to move. But he stayed right where he was, selfishly absorbing her warmth, her heady scent, inhaling her very essence as if that would save him. But nothing could save him. He was beyond redemption in more ways than he could count.

Blanking out behind the wheel had cemented the realisation.

And still he found himself leaning into her, his lips finding that soft, sweet spot below her ear lobe where he knew she loved to be kissed. He kissed it, felt her try to shift away, and trapped her in his arms.

‘Rafael...’

He trailed his mouth down her neck, to the pulse that jumped when he flicked his tongue against it.

The shaking receded a little, the numbness fading under the pulse of seductive heat that was all Raven. Greedily, he tried to grab onto it, to delay the encroaching darkness beneath the bliss of her touch. With a deep groan, he moved to cup her breasts.

Only to fall into a deeper hell when she pulled away and rushed to her feet.

‘Sex isn’t going to make this problem go away.’

Darkness prowled closer. ‘I know, but a guy can still dream, can’t he?’

‘No, it’s time for reality. We need to discuss what happened. When I saw you throwing up, I thought it was a panic attack. But I think it’s more than that,’ she said.

Ice snapped through him, freezing him once more to the soul. ‘Leave it, Raven.’

‘No, you need help, Rafael.’

He couldn’t hold her gaze—she saw far too much—so he concentrated on his clenched fists. ‘And you think you’re the one to offer that help?’

He knew his tone was unduly harsh but he had gone beyond remorse. He was in his special frozen place.

‘What happened?’ Her voice pleaded for understanding.

Since he was at a loss himself, he contemplated silence. Then he contemplated seduction. When bile threatened, he contemplated pleading for mercy.

Through frozen lips, he found himself speaking. ‘I remembered everything about the race in Hungary.’

He looked up to see her hands fly to her lips. He gave a grim smile and stared back down at his hands. Hands that shook uncontrollably.

‘You know what I remember most about it?’

She shook her head.

‘As I went to the wall, I knew, no matter what happened, no matter how hard I tried, I wasn’t going to die.’

‘You mean you...wanted to die?’ Horror coated her words.

He shrugged. ‘It doesn’t matter what I wanted. I knew it wasn’t going to happen. My expertise lies in many other areas. Killing myself isn’t one of them.’

‘I don’t... Explain, please.’

He raised his head, took in her tall, proud figure and felt a moment of regret that he’d messed this up too. She was one thing he’d have fought to hang on to, if it hadn’t been too late for him.

‘I’ve been dicing with death since I was old enough to walk. If a situation has an element of danger, I’m there. Being born with racing imprinted into my DNA was just a bonus.’

‘Even if it ends up consuming you so thoroughly it kills you?’

The look that came over his face was so gut-wrenchingly stark she felt pain resonate inside her. ‘Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that—’

He shook his head. ‘I won’t die from racing.’

‘Are you retiring?’

He dashed the hope in her question. ‘No. Regardless of everything that’s happened, I still crave it. I’ve been spared death so far. It seems I’m destined for other things.’

A frown formed. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Haven’t you guessed it yet? My skill lies in killing everything I come into contact with. If you haven’t woken to the fact that all I’ll bring to your doorstep is utter chaos then you’re not as bright as I thought.’

‘That sounds like...are you trying to warn me off you?’

He laughed. ‘Sí, I am. Which in itself is strange. Normally, I just take what I want and leave the husk behind.’

Pain darkened her eyes. ‘Why are you doing this?’

‘Doing what, querida?’

‘Trying to belittle what we have, and don’t use that endearment any more. It’s a beautiful word you’ve made tacky because you don’t really mean it. You’re trying to paint yourself in a vile light, trying to put me off you so I’ll walk away.’